The Protectorate of Paffnia is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Aleksandar Vekili with an even hand, and notable for its smutty television, anti-smoking policies, and lack of airports. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful, devout population of 21.093 billion Paffniacs enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, socially-minded morass — juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Skoptopolis. The income tax rate is 100%.

The powerhouse Paffniac economy, worth a remarkable 4,247 trillion paffnars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 201,355 paffnars, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Police struggle to solve crimes due to the lack of fingerprint records, the nation's diplomats shake hands with those whose hands are drenched in the blood of innocents, prudishness is on the way out, and replacement organs are grown in vats. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Paffnia's national animal is the cow, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Paffnia is ranked 201,349^th in the world and 3^rd in Vapor III for Most Advanced Defense Forces, scoring -10.95 on the Total War Preparedness Rating.