The Holy Order of Pyha-Suomi is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Grand Priestess VII Irina Karjalainen with an iron fist, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, ban on automobiles, and public floggings. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 1.512 billion Suomalainens are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Spirituality, Defense, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kemijärvi. The average income tax rate is 80.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but underdeveloped Suomalainen economy, worth 72.8 trillion Lumipalloes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Trout Farming industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Furniture Restoration. Average income is 48,118 Lumipalloes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Protesters are up in arms over new nuclear power stations, Protestant-Orthodoxy has been named as Pyha-Suomi's national religion, the nation wears its high incidence of chromosomal diseases as a badge of pride, and houses and businesses are bulldozed to make way for ever-expanding cemeteries. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Pyha-Suomi's national animal is the Arctic Fox, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Protestant-Orthodoxy.

Pyha-Suomi is ranked 274,194^th in the world and 2^nd in The Realm of Rats for Largest Basket Weaving Sector, scoring -6.03 on the Hickory Productivity Index.