by Max Barry

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National Flag

The Grand Duchy of Quinto Piano

“Matricole of the world, unite!”

Category: Father Knows Best State
Civil Rights:
Political Freedoms:

Regional Influence: Shoeshiner

Location: The East Pacific


Quinto Piano

Population664 million

CapitalCoffee Quinto


The Grand Duchy of Quinto Piano is a huge, genial nation, remarkable for its compulsory military service, irreverence towards religion, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, cynical population of 664 million Quintopianistas are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Education, with Administration, Healthcare, and Law & Order also on the agenda, while Spirituality isn't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Coffee Quinto. The average income tax rate is 71.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Quintopianista economy, worth 75.2 trillion Doghes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Trout Farming, Tourism, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an impressive 113,253 Doghes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Picnickers are lucky if a few wasps are the only animals that trouble them, the nation is committed to nuclear rearmament, the government has awarded itself a month-long holiday to celebrate its achievements, and motorcycle riders are required to wear so much gear they've been nicknamed "Stay Pufts". Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Quinto Piano's national animal is the Fratton, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Quinto Piano is ranked 18,640th in the world and 561st in The East Pacific for Largest Welfare Programs, scoring 3,427.09 on the Safety Net Mesh Density Rating.

Most World Assembly Endorsements: 2,046thTop
Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 2,341stMost Influential: 4,342ndMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 5,404thLargest Agricultural Sector: 7,540thTop
Most Secular: 11,730thMost Cheerful Citizens: 11,783rdHighest Poor Incomes: 13,390thHealthiest Citizens: 13,579thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 13,613thMost Valuable International Artwork: 13,741stMost Advanced Public Education: 13,932ndLongest Average Lifespans: 14,019thNicest Citizens: 14,744thMost Inclusive: 16,011thMost Scientifically Advanced: 16,034thMost Compassionate Citizens: 16,137thLargest Information Technology Sector: 16,690thSmartest Citizens: 17,312thMost Developed: 17,694thLargest Welfare Programs: 18,640thLowest Crime Rates: 20,387th
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 129th in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 131st in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 148th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 219th in the regionMost Influential: 293rd in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 361st in the regionTop
Healthiest Citizens: 406th in the regionMost Secular: 407th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 412th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 412th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 415th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 430th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 440th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 456th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 466th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 475th in the regionNicest Citizens: 503rd in the regionMost Inclusive: 516th in the regionMost Developed: 528th in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 556th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 561st in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 561st in the regionLargest Governments: 570th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 604th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 641st in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 664th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 684th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 706th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 806th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Quinto Piano, motorcycle riders are required to wear so much gear they've been nicknamed "Stay Pufts".
  • : Quinto Piano was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most World Assembly Endorsements and the Top 10% for Lowest Crime Rates.
  • : Following new legislation in Quinto Piano, the government has awarded itself a month-long holiday to celebrate its achievements.
  • : Following new legislation in Quinto Piano, the nation is committed to nuclear rearmament.
  • : Following new legislation in Quinto Piano, picnickers are lucky if a few wasps are the only animals that trouble them.
  • : Quinto Piano was reclassified from "Corrupt Dictatorship" to "Father Knows Best State".
  • : Following new legislation in Quinto Piano, Quintopianista Standard Vodka is the only drink that bars stock.
  • : Quinto Piano was reclassified from "Father Knows Best State" to "Corrupt Dictatorship".
  • : Following new legislation in Quinto Piano, the path to inner peace is paved with state-mandated punishment.
  • : Quinto Piano was endorsed by The Endorse Libertanny of Khadah.


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 116 » VW53Aland, Liberstankonia, H-Zhena, Stellar Colonies, Brotherland, Zukchiva, Asendavia, Axdel, Todd McCloud, Dragons Blood, Libertanny, Pakitsk, Raunch, Rainbow Vests, Kaigi, Kangarawa, Socialist Holy American Empire, Lingu, Lanagon, Monteconstance, Goodnamesarerare, CopyCato, Wiranath, The Soviet Space Commie Union, Eagas, Outer Verron Swicia Islands, BuciLand, The Three States of Fortuna, The Cult of the Great Cthulhu, Talitoa, Imperial Akatsuki, Republic of Berzerkistan, The Almighty Country, Ripsylvania, Staynes, The Solar Ottomans, The State of McDonalds, Davinhia, Marrabuk, Tretrid, Greater New Cassandra, The Eternal Land of Jong, Unger under over, CheeseBurrito, Sokala, Drunken Seal Islands, BearStackof2015, Lyontisia, Bai Lung, The United Asian Republics, and 66 others.A Slanted Black Stripe, Trimmania, Bullpups, Ridann, United China Nation, Slys Paws, Roliganistan, Mays Austrian Nation, Technocratic Tagalog, Coruh, Wizardonia, Akorial, Adolanta, The Brazillian Parlament Of Idideology, Evrigenis, East Malaysia, Enlil, Plazland, Tseriesiscoming, Modra, Kanadeer, Zang0, Rohanland, La xinga, Chria Deau, Euricanis, The Death Syndicate, Squid Ruinosa, ReeK, Arkantis, The United Neo American Union, Riveraland, Abtracnt, Rhealaliit, Washingtonian Order, Seri Tai Republic, Filipopol, Headpat Central, Kucia, Kriov, Dragonia, Grossvietnam, The Empire of Rijelv, Grey Haven of Tauraucania, Barfleur, A mean old man, Biggstonia, Santa Dystopia, Bytes, Survivoristan, Great Aztlatan CommonWealth, Refuge Isle, Osterreich und Ungarn, Propwash, BTProductions, Harro Waarudho, Interdimensional Waifus, Freedomindia, Adavan, Firenation91, Broengtopia, Schrebia, Endertopias, Under Sea Desert, Taurora, and Khadah.

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