The Republic of Ralphburg is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Ralph J Russell with an iron fist, and renowned for its public floggings, absence of drug laws, and restrictive gun laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 10.801 billion Ralphburgers are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The relatively small, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ralphburg. The average income tax rate is 20.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Ralphburgian economy, worth a remarkable 2,953 trillion Dogecoins a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an amazing 273,404 Dogecoins, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.4 times as much as the poorest.

The government seizes corporate assets it deems 'scary enough', there has been a series of riots between local cannibals and health food advocates, farmers have taken to hunting billionaires who encroach on their land, and Ralph J Russell's peyote-induced "let's all just be friends" speech is trending world-wide. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ralphburg's national animal is the big smoldog, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Ralphburg is ranked 5,429^th in the world and 148^th in the South Pacific for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 59.06 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.