The North Pole Republic of San Marsico is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Santa Claus with an even hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, pith helmet sales, and unlimited-speed roads. The compassionate, devout population of 1.571 billion San Marsicoans are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Environment, Law & Order, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of City of the North Pole. The average income tax rate is 57.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong San Marsicoan economy, worth 104 trillion Snowflakes a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Trout Farming, Basket Weaving, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 66,303 Snowflakes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The native owl population is in permanent hibernation, posters on 'San Marsicoan Values' advise against being proud of San Marsico, military equipment stores have a tendency to go up in flames, and photographers have to apply for a license to photograph Santa Claus. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. San Marsico's national animal is the Reindeer, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

San Marsico is ranked 98,341^st in the world and 1,636^th in the South Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring 8.45 on the Scary Big Number Scale.