The Federal Republic of Schnarchi is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by Fluffy Longbottom with a fair hand, and remarkable for its daily referendums, hatred of cheese, and complete absence of social welfare. The compassionate, democratic population of 13.108 billion Schnarchians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cruzo City. The average income tax rate is 66.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Schnarchian economy, worth a remarkable 1,139 trillion Feeps a year, is highly specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing and Information Technology. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 86,902 Feeps, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government is financing an extremely costly war against malaria, a government program is underway to revitalize Schnarchi's beaches, the mob and the police have recently had numerous clashes in the back alleys of Schnarchi's cities due to the government's steadfast anti-casino stance, and the government is giving peace a chance. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Schnarchi's national animal is the Bearded Dragon, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Pastafarianism.

Schnarchi is ranked 994^th in the world and 688^th in The North Pacific for Most World Assembly Endorsements, with 150 Valid Endorsements.