by Max Barry

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The Matriarchy of Sean Splicer

“The job is lying about the lies we lied about ...daily!”

Category: Iron Fist Consumerists
Civil Rights:
Unheard Of
Economy:
Good
Political Freedoms:
Outlawed

Regional Influence: Dominator

Location: Donald Trumpland

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Sean Splicer

Population7.87 billion

CapitalLightcolorsuitabad
Leaderthe Mobile Podium
Faiththe hugest inauguration crowd ever

Currencylies and distortion
Animalmedia

The Matriarchy of Sean Splicer is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by the Mobile Podium with an iron fist, and notable for its state-planned economy, compulsory military service, and triple-decker prams. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 7.87 billion Sean Splicerites are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Law & Order, although Defense, Administration, and Spirituality are also considered important. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Lightcolorsuitabad. The average income tax rate is 49.3%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The Sean Splicerish economy, worth 370 trillion lies and distortions a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is broadly diversified, is led by the Door-to-door Insurance Sales industry, with significant contributions from Trout Farming, Retail, and Furniture Restoration. Average income is 47,128 lies and distortions, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.2 times as much as the poorest.

Singing in public is only allowed if you are singing the praise of the Motherland, calling dibs is an unalienable right, public incontinence is a growing problem amongst the nation's women, and foreign leaders who don't applaud the Mobile Podium's speeches are regarded as enemies of Sean Splicer. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Sean Splicer's national animal is the media and its national religion is the hugest inauguration crowd ever.

Sean Splicer is ranked 80,675th in the world and 2nd in Donald Trumpland for Largest Soda Pop Sector, scoring 1,350.42 on the Addison-Fukk Productivity Rating.

Top
5%
Largest Insurance Industry: 9,726thMost Authoritarian: 10,648thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 10,831stTop
10%
Most Ignorant Citizens: 12,646thMost Stationary: 14,527thMost Conservative: 15,431st

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Sean Splicer, foreign leaders who don't applaud the Mobile Podium's speeches are regarded as enemies of Sean Splicer.
  • : Sean Splicer was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Highest Workforce Participation Rate.
  • : Following new legislation in Sean Splicer, public incontinence is a growing problem amongst the nation's women.
  • : Sean Splicer was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Authoritarian.
  • : Sean Splicer was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Advanced Law Enforcement.
  • : Following new legislation in Sean Splicer, calling dibs is an unalienable right.
  • : Following new legislation in Sean Splicer, singing in public is only allowed if you are singing the praise of the Motherland.
  • : Following new legislation in Sean Splicer, children need to wear helmets and safety harnesses before mounting a carousel horse.
  • : Sean Splicer was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Fattest Citizens.
  • : Sean Splicer was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Highest Workforce Participation Rate.

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