by Max Barry

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The Sacred State of Shelly

“All Hail Supreme Leader, Cole Shelly!” Cole James William Shelly

Category: Iron Fist Consumerists
Civil Rights:
Outlawed
Economy:
All-Consuming
Political Freedoms:
Outlawed

Regional Influence: Superpower

Location: The Sacred States of Shelly

OverviewFactbookPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Shelly

Population2.661 billion

CapitalShelly
LeaderCole James William Shelly
FaithShellianism

CurrencyCole
AnimalNorthern Shelly Samsquanch

The Sacred State of Shelly is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Cole James William Shelly with an iron fist, and remarkable for its infamous sell-swords, enslaved workforce, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 2.661 billion Shellies are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Shelly. The average income tax rate is 38.2%.

The all-consuming Shellie economy, worth 367 trillion Coles a year, is dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 138,195 Coles, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.7 times as much as the poorest.

The nation has nearly as many history museums as Shellies, the hills are alive with the sound of ringtones, stranded astronauts hitch rides on foreign spacecraft to get home, and right-wingers complain that too many people are suckling at the welfare teat. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Shelly's national animal is the Northern Shelly Samsquanch, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Shellianism.

Shelly is ranked 17,094th in the world and 1st in The Sacred States of Shelly for Longest Average Lifespans, with 90.39 Years.

Top
1%
Largest Insurance Industry: 1,624thMost Devout: 2,058thTop
5%
Largest Mining Sector: 2,237thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2,721stLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2,823rdLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 2,981stMost Avoided: 4,333rdMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 4,852ndLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 5,041stMost Corrupt Governments: 5,314thLargest Black Market: 7,318thMost Conservative: 7,982ndMost Valuable International Artwork: 8,676thHighest Disposable Incomes: 9,327thMost Authoritarian: 9,815thTop
10%
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 11,568thHealthiest Citizens: 12,309thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 12,310thLowest Crime Rates: 13,544thHighest Average Incomes: 16,425thLongest Average Lifespans: 17,094th

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Shelly, right-wingers complain that too many people are suckling at the welfare teat.
  • : Following new legislation in Shelly, stranded astronauts hitch rides on foreign spacecraft to get home.
  • : Following new legislation in Shelly, the hills are alive with the sound of ringtones.
  • : Following new legislation in Shelly, the nation has nearly as many history museums as Shellies.
  • : Following new legislation in Shelly, ghost regiments exist only on paper.
  • : Shelly was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Authoritarian.
  • : Following new legislation in Shelly, officer recruitment and police brutality have reached an all-time high.
  • : Following new legislation in Shelly, selling your granddad's clothes requires an incredible amount of paperwork.
  • : Following new legislation in Shelly, the 3rd Airborne Beekeepers are the most feared regiment in the Shellie military.
  • : Following new legislation in Shelly, children as young as twelve are conscripted into the armed forces.

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