by Max Barry

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National Flag

The Free Land of Sjalmia

“Status Above Anything”

Category: Iron Fist Consumerists
Civil Rights:
Rare
Economy:
Powerhouse
Political Freedoms:
Outlawed

Regional Influence: Unproven

Location: Osiris

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Sjalmia

Population2.144 billion

CapitalGrand Palatial City of Sjalmia
LeaderGreat Supreme Overlord Sjalmi

Currencygrain
Animalant

The Free Land of Sjalmia is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Great Supreme Overlord Sjalmi with an iron fist, and remarkable for its frequent executions, compulsory military service, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 2.144 billion Sjalmians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Industry, and Administration also on the agenda, while International Aid and Spirituality receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Grand Palatial City of Sjalmia. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 22.1%.

The powerhouse Sjalmian economy, worth 217 trillion grains a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Retail. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 101,272 grains, with the richest citizens earning 9.8 times as much as the poorest.

The military is recruiting war criminals to join its weapons research teams, every fourth child is born with flippers instead of hands, 4-year-olds studying for their mathematics exams are anxious that they will be unemployable in adulthood if they fail, and children gain their first sex education from reading the dictionary. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Sjalmia's national animal is the ant, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Sjalmia is ranked 150,951st in the world and 5,887th in Osiris for Most Average, scoring 29.93 on the Average Standardized Normality Scale.

Top
5%
Most Secular: 2,726thFattest Citizens: 7,215thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 7,484thLargest Mining Sector: 9,915thTop
10%
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 10,495thHighest Disposable Incomes: 11,308thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 14,793rdLargest Manufacturing Sector: 15,611thMost Avoided: 15,878thLargest Retail Industry: 16,120thMost Corrupt Governments: 17,594thLargest Black Market: 17,597thMost Authoritarian: 18,729thMost Conservative: 18,943rd
Top
5%
Most Secular: 101st in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 303rd in the regionTop
10%
Fattest Citizens: 401st in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 513th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 528th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 590th in the regionMost Conservative: 675th in the regionMost Authoritarian: 678th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Sjalmia's influence in Osiris rose from "Zero" to "Unproven".
  • : Sjalmia was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector and Fattest Citizens and the Top 10% for Most Conservative and Most Authoritarian.
  • : Following new legislation in Sjalmia, children gain their first sex education from reading the dictionary.
  • : Following new legislation in Sjalmia, 4-year-olds studying for their mathematics exams are anxious that they will be unemployable in adulthood if they fail.
  • : Following new legislation in Sjalmia, every fourth child is born with flippers instead of hands.
  • : Following new legislation in Sjalmia, the military is recruiting war criminals to join its weapons research teams.
  • : Following new legislation in Sjalmia, the health budget has been diverted into prolonging Great Supreme Overlord Sjalmi's life.
  • : Sjalmia was refounded in Osiris.
  • : Sjalmia ceased to exist in Osiris.
  • : Sjalmia was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Highest Disposable Incomes.

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