The Federal Kingdom of Skwar is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by King Thomas with an even hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, ubiquitous missile silos, and complete lack of public education. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless, devout population of 11.681 billion Skwarans enjoy extensive civil freedoms, particularly in social issues, while business tends to be more regulated.

The minute, corrupt government, or what there is of one, is primarily concerned with Defense, although Industry and Administration are also considered important, while Environment and Welfare are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Skwar Capital District. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Skwarish economy, worth a remarkable 2,809 trillion escudoes a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 240,558 escudoes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

War is made in the name of love, appliance stores are finding spy cameras embedded in their unboxed merchandise, education is transforming people into first-rate snobs, and King Thomas's media campaigns take a hiatus around exam week. Crime is relatively low. Skwar's national animal is the Skwar honu, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Skwaricism.

Skwar is ranked 285,111^th in the world and 4,823^rd in the South Pacific for Safest, scoring 15.14 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.