by Max Barry

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The United States of Smesh

“Привет товарищ”

Category: Right-wing Utopia
Civil Rights:
Some
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Good

Regional Influence: Shoeshiner

Location: The North Pacific

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Smesh

Population633 million

CapitalThe Center Of

Currency9mm
AnimalBlack Bear

The United States of Smesh is a huge, efficient nation, renowned for its strictly enforced bedtime, compulsory military service, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working population of 633 million Smeshians are free to succeed or fail in life on their own merits; the successful tend to enjoy an opulent (but moralistic) lifestyle, while the failures can be seen crowding out most jails.

The tiny, corrupt, pro-business government is dominated by the Department of Defense, with Industry also on the agenda, while Welfare and International Aid receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Center Of. The average income tax rate is 3.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Smeshian economy, worth 88.8 trillion 9mms a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Gambling, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an impressive 140,304 9mms, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.5 times as much as the poorest.

Drugs containing the compound "oleum de serpens" are being sold to cancer patients, the Finance Ministry posts hourly updates on where taxpayer money is spent, abortions are carried out secretly in shady backstreet clinics, and the nation's first space rocket -- sponsored by Eckie-Ecola and shaped like an enormous soda bottle -- is being developed. Crime, especially youth-related, is pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Smesh's national animal is the Black Bear, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Smesh is ranked 105,885th in the world and 4,942nd in The North Pacific for Largest Basket Weaving Sector, scoring 1,398.89 on the Hickory Productivity Index.

Top
1%
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 546thLargest Gambling Industry: 1,349thTop
5%
Most Influential: 2,088thHighest Crime Rates: 2,263rdLowest Overall Tax Burden: 2,383rdFattest Citizens: 2,876thMost Avoided: 2,892ndRudest Citizens: 3,122ndHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 3,232ndHighest Disposable Incomes: 3,566thLargest Mining Sector: 3,592ndMost Armed: 3,867thLargest Retail Industry: 4,041stLargest Soda Pop Sector: 4,045thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 6,029thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 6,334thMost Corrupt Governments: 9,854thTop
10%
Most Valuable International Artwork: 10,924thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 13,572ndLargest Insurance Industry: 14,186thHighest Average Incomes: 15,769thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 16,551stMost Rebellious Youth: 20,057th
Top
1%
Largest Gambling Industry: 45th in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 63rd in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 84th in the regionMost Avoided: 91st in the regionTop
5%
Fattest Citizens: 101st in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 107th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 116th in the regionMost Armed: 132nd in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 133rd in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 162nd in the regionRudest Citizens: 182nd in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 206th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 258th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 259th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 391st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 441st in the regionTop
10%
Most Advanced Defense Forces: 497th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 553rd in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 640th in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 644th in the regionMost Influential: 722nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 755th in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 767th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 814th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 824th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Smesh was endorsed by The Empire of Imperial Tenno.
  • : Smesh was endorsed by The Kingdom of Merconitonitopia.
  • : Smesh was endorsed by The Empire of Sopernia.
  • : Following new legislation in Smesh, the nation's first space rocket -- sponsored by Eckie-Ecola and shaped like an enormous soda bottle -- is being developed.
  • : Following new legislation in Smesh, abortions are carried out secretly in shady backstreet clinics.
  • : Following new legislation in Smesh, the Finance Ministry posts hourly updates on where taxpayer money is spent.
  • : Following new legislation in Smesh, drugs containing the compound "oleum de serpens" are being sold to cancer patients.
  • : Smesh endorsed The Holy of Abonland.
  • : Smesh was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Ignorant Citizens.
  • : Smesh was endorsed by The Holy of Abonland.

More...

World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 247 » Marinxa, Koda-Land, McMasterdonia, Timothea, Territorio di Nessuno, Ihese, Fayyayid, Ethnon, Valhalla123, Sundred, Guer Aike, Pallaith, Sikol, Noahs Second Country, The Rhein States, Newpromisedland, Siwale, Westinor, Interdimensional Zone, Shibutani, Xagill, Antworship, Orado, Zzozona, Great Bights Mum, New Lakemba, El Fiji Grande, Empy, Xentherida, Fauzjhia, Omnistria, Saperisole, Notyoutopia, Sunto, Hamerica, Yaorozu, Dabarastan, Dreadton, Daiz, Corfad, Praeceps, Ver Testua, Dar es Saalam, North Bratislava, The Pantheons, Sil Dorsett, The Serdey Islands, Pazair, Frostcell, Korovan Isles, and 197 others.Valentine Z, Advancia-Sizzletown, The Iron Lions, Wisconsota, Frances Francis the First of France, Eri-Maqa-Ena, The Empire of the Federation, Votak Matim, I Like Killing people, Fox Richy, Termathe, 1 very fast endotarter, The Tampa Bay Rays, Schnuftelland, Zumlandia, Seenvorland, Selfgradatude, Arlens Apartment, Former English Colony, Libertania Democratica, Prydania, Shinjuku tokyo 0, Kranostav, Unshleepd, Wineclaw, Kocherian, Toygu Land, The Sinclarian Provinces, Palisede, Zimmerdachen, Minuda, PotatoFarmers, The Calabash Protectorate, Gilakistan, Fel Imass, Chukstik Illahi, Holy Oranz, Oceanialia, Clan Spaniel, Aoncarpa, Solcius, Yukti, Greater New America, The Endless Eventide, 6th Rome, SORT, Eywaan, Dicko, Fendlium, Arrivederci, Seanat, Freyford, Yokciq Empire, Pleroma Sans Romans, Pizza Squared, Brucklania, Plangainer, Arichia, Joodey, Howlerd Islands, Hopsin, The Gamer Party, Gabenia, The True Frog, Jovian Knights, Dangine, R libanon, Harveney, Dakota Territories, The Discipled, Pokemanland, The Free States of Avalon, The Real Ram Ranch, Camikistan, Caselpania, Highton Islands, Kahlo, Cartures, United Island States of Southeast Asia, Teg, Unsophisticate, Miamington, Zecit, Brifranssia, Virillum, Texas States, Entecavir, Yalgora, New Jamgra, Unimaginable Doom, Maclare, Panama Coalition, Shadowrik, Animu Place, Xyrron, Nistriabar, East Supple Lund, Eastern Cous Empria, Nouvelle-Floride, Copola, Cretox State, Eraver, Tikariot, Phire Fric, Kragsgale, Lux Conos, Fascist Democracy, Olofin, Ivernary, The Kingdom and Realm of Anubis, Drutopia Insomnia, Nordic-British Union, Nichigo Sebe, LostLegion, Marmiedon, Volstokn, Wolvenland, Solmetria, Principia Mathematica, Amblegreserland, Anungu, Joevala, Paul Pasch, Madjack, Irunjarai, Abject Ludicrosity, USSRITWILLWORK, Calamazo, Ihsan, Ravendi, Maynilan, The Federal Republic of Scouseland, Xipher, Simone Republic, Drentusa, Astal Aavors, Amerian States, Free Nation of Hong Kong, Illusia and Neverendia, United Kahndaq, Andexia, Buckhem, Ultra777, Sisang, Moubarakistan, Godwanna, Totalitarian Systems, WeKnow, U S Eh, New Tronia, Loutsland, Saint Alaric, Democratic Republic of Kohland, Heilhum Imperius, Eschatosia, Nationeer, Vincone Cae, Napnomadia, Eurochina, Runeda, Draconian Progression, West Papua states, Nobec, ArizonaRepublic, Xyroxes, Therizia, Zemper Macro, Eslatani, Hardscrabble, Navsland, Intion North, Harjad, Holy Empire Of Greater Bavaria, Neo Cheese Empire, Mediterrea, Verytas, Frahnkzaden, Ramiru, Diplomasqi, Tukayyiad, Lulubellia, Fitchy, Aerilia, Morover, Daxuxian, Outer Shenendoah, Glanst, Amprak, Supreme Leader Hadrian, Comfed, The Kingdom Of Wagies, Chips and Guac, Rozarus, Abonland, Sopernia, Merconitonitopia, and Imperial Tenno.

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