by Max Barry

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Spotlight on:

National Flag

The United Socialist States of SmittysHotTakes

“Liberty And Equality For All”

Category: Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
Civil Rights:
Political Freedoms:

Regional Influence: Shoeshiner

Location: The North Pacific



Population1.496 billion


The United Socialist States of SmittysHotTakes is a massive, efficient nation, remarkable for its museums and concert halls, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, democratic population of 1.496 billion SmittysHotTakesians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. The average income tax rate is 88.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient SmittysHotTakesian economy, worth 178 trillion hottakes a year, is highly specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 119,527 hottakes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.7 times as much as the poorest.

Lifelong celibates are surprised to receive government-issue condoms in the post, fashion models are guaranteed to be 100% genuinely as anorexic as they appear on magazine covers, on graduation day the hats thrown in the air fly high enough to stun passing pigeons, and only vaccinated citizens may have free healthcare. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. SmittysHotTakes's national animal is the pigeon, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

SmittysHotTakes is ranked 4,064th in the world and 227th in The North Pacific for Least Corrupt Governments, with 95.4 Percentage Of Bribes Refused.

Most World Assembly Endorsements: 918thMost Influential: 1,313thTop
Most Pacifist: 3,437thLeast Corrupt Governments: 4,064thSafest: 4,725thMost Advanced Public Education: 5,282ndMost Compassionate Citizens: 5,512thNicest Citizens: 5,528thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 5,602ndMost Inclusive: 5,643rdMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 5,976thLargest Welfare Programs: 6,027thHealthiest Citizens: 6,689thMost Cheerful Citizens: 6,903rdLongest Average Lifespans: 7,313thMost Secular: 8,189thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 8,549thBest Weather: 8,754thSmartest Citizens: 9,438thMost Scientifically Advanced: 9,508thHighest Average Tax Rates: 9,978thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 9,999thMost Beautiful Environments: 10,097thLargest Information Technology Sector: 10,118thMost Advanced Public Transport: 10,189thMost Cultured: 10,520thLowest Crime Rates: 11,072ndLargest Governments: 11,763rdTop
Most Valuable International Artwork: 12,415thMost Developed: 12,746thMost Rebellious Youth: 13,061stHighest Poor Incomes: 22,782ndHighest Drug Use: 22,934thHighest Average Incomes: 23,742nd
Most Pacifist: 211th in the regionLeast Corrupt Governments: 227th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 235th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 267th in the regionSafest: 267th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 310th in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 324th in the regionNicest Citizens: 324th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 335th in the regionMost Inclusive: 355th in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 367th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 391st in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 433rd in the regionMost Secular: 434th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 436th in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 466th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 497th in the regionBest Weather: 498th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 501st in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 502nd in the regionTop
Smartest Citizens: 522nd in the regionMost Cultured: 534th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 535th in the regionMost Influential: 545th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 548th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 557th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 567th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 569th in the regionLargest Governments: 586th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 637th in the regionNudest: 649th in the regionMost Developed: 740th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 992nd in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : SmittysHotTakes was endorsed by The Reformed State of Centrialand.
  • : SmittysHotTakes was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Highest Average Incomes.
  • : Following new legislation in SmittysHotTakes, only vaccinated citizens may have free healthcare.
  • : Following new legislation in SmittysHotTakes, on graduation day the hats thrown in the air fly high enough to stun passing pigeons.
  • : Following new legislation in SmittysHotTakes, fashion models are guaranteed to be 100% genuinely as anorexic as they appear on magazine covers.
  • : Following new legislation in SmittysHotTakes, lifelong celibates are surprised to receive government-issue condoms in the post.
  • : Following new legislation in SmittysHotTakes, nations that kill a SmittysHotTakesian can expect a strongly worded letter.
  • : Following new legislation in SmittysHotTakes, schools have extensive counseling programs for troubled students.
  • : Following new legislation in SmittysHotTakes, children raised in multi-faith households claim the other deity would let them stay up later.
  • : SmittysHotTakes was reclassified from "Left-Leaning College State" to "Inoffensive Centrist Democracy".


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 203 » Hamerica, Newpromisedland, Omnistria, Yaorozu, Ethnon, Great Bights Mum, Guer Aike, The Iron Lions, Shibutani, Corfad, Fauzjhia, Libertania Democratica, Koda-Land, Prydania, The Rhein States, Sundred, Territorio di Nessuno, Dreadton, Daiz, McMasterdonia, Empy, New Lakemba, Zzozona, Highton Islands, El Fiji Grande, Pallaith, Sikol, The Tampa Bay Rays, Brucklania, Orado, Eri-Maqa-Ena, Malta Comino Gozo, Sunto, Zeternia, Dar es Saalam, Ravendi, Notyoutopia, Siwale, Frances Francis the First of France, Clan Spaniel, Dabarastan, North Bratislava, Kranostav, Kocherian, United Kahndaq, Wineclaw, Seenvorland, Kragsgale, Xipher, Fendlium, and 153 others.Pokemanland, Interdimensional Zone, Former English Colony, 1 very fast endotarter, Simone Republic, Selfgradatude, Valentine Z, Amerian States, Xagill, The Calabash Protectorate, Illusia and Neverendia, Maclare, Andexia, Sil Dorsett, Xyrron, Solskjar, Pope Saint Peter the Apostle, East Akra, Seanat, Yokciq Empire, Moubarakistan, Termathe, U S Eh, Napnomadia, Loutsland, Heilhum Imperius, Vincone Cae, Votak Matim, Orogonia, Wilkshire, Runeda, Harjad, Eywaan, Aerilia, The Endless Eventide, Cretox State, Morover, Visse, Holy Oranz, Unsophisticate, Confederacy of North America, The Canadian Peoples Republic, Lulubellia, Shadowrik, Supreme Leader Hadrian, Elvoreto, Outer Shenendoah, Magna Banitia, Chips and Guac, Navsland, Jestings, Hardscrabble, North Unity, Liminyj, Merconitonitopia, A Salmon Named Harold, Draconian Progression, Madjack, Viridiann, Pigeonstan, Joodey, PotatoFarmers, Cosamaloapan, The Democratic Kingdom Of Skaraborg, Republica Guilleana, Religioncord, Pytong, Testnation223, Bankowiata, Kazoo Basin, WeKnow, The Peoples Republic of Kyle, PEG, The Stratosphere Islands, Pasargad, Vivanco, Imperial Pieserged, The Pantheons, Maratabat, Sevinland, Shinjuku tokyo 0, Northern-Kempia, The Serdey Islands, Slyakanya, Free Atlantis, Odelinor, Nodnarb, Yellops, Climeria, Seijitsu, Blyskalia, Port Naga, Darkmondoria, Holy Empire of Greater Bavaria, Godwanna, Bharathvarsh, Svenskskit, Strongwill, His Enduring Majesty, Star Kingdom, Glurponia, Wisconsota, Erowo, Nalver And, Landestian, Xentherida, Hyphen, Planes, Que Lukustinardon, Zyvetskistaahn, Upper Libertatem, Patrician, Crusadam, The Mazur Empire, Sachi, The AnCap Pirate Utopia, KhalChicken, Valorines, Colfes, Barabolia, Zemnaya Svoboda, Otakus and Weebs, Valgarda, Vesteysia, Venicea, Texanz, Greater Afroeurasia, Kromi, Francois Isidore, Travislavania, Svenskan, Maott, Figyjharli, Wapistan, Sanjurika, Trumpski, Duryanistan, Gondwanaia, Questann, Lol2639, Dangine, Servilis, Siforpeo, Shotokonia, Tyirza, Super Girl, Uzbek Khan, Fraystonia, BTProductions, Aryan Homeland, Steampunk Ariel, Alexander the Magnus, and Centrialand.

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