The State of Somers Isles is a gargantuan, efficient nation, remarkable for its absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 32.87 billion Somers Islesians hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The relatively small, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Capital Heights. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 9.6%.

The very strong Somers Islesian economy, worth a remarkable 1,429 trillion betales a year, is led by the Gambling industry, with major contributions from Beef-Based Agriculture, Furniture Restoration, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Average income is 43,494 betales, with the richest citizens earning 6.8 times as much as the poorest.

The government is avowedly atheist, the military frequently holds bake sales to raise funds, Somers Isles is notorious for its citizens' infidelity, and Somers Isles has designated Capital Heights as its capital city. Crime is moderate, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Somers Isles's national animal is the deer, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities.

Somers Isles is ranked 11,793^rd in the world and 7^th in Zambia for Lowest Crime Rates, with 53.37 law-abiding acts per hour.