by Max Barry

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The United Socialist States of Sowjet Union

“Proletarians of all countries unite”

Category: Democratic Socialists
Civil Rights:
Good
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Very Good

Regional Influence: Shoeshiner

Location: Balder

OverviewFactbookDispatchesPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Sowjet Union

Population14.42 billion

Currencyno currency
Animalsea ant

The United Socialist States of Sowjet Union is a gargantuan, genial nation, notable for its anti-smoking policies, national health service, and multi-spousal wedding ceremonies. The compassionate, cheerful population of 14.42 billion Sowjet Unionians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, socially-minded government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Environment. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Sowjet Unionian economy, worth a remarkable 2,554 trillion no currencies a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is solely comprised of the Cheese Exports industry. Average income is an impressive 177,156 no currencies, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

One tree's worth of paperwork accompanies each imported log of timber, where there's smoke there's the Sowjet Unionian Forestry Department, Leader's reputation is hard as nails, and mantis shrimp studies is academia's fastest-growing field. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Sowjet Union's national animal is the sea ant, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Sowjet Union is ranked 295,792nd in the world and 10,255th in Balder for Fattest Citizens, with 2.62 Obesity Rate.

Top
1%
Highest Foreign Aid Spending: 94thMost Advanced Public Transport: 94thLargest Welfare Programs: 110thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 408thMost Advanced Public Education: 474thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 536thMost Pacifist: 716thMost Compassionate Citizens: 895thHighest Average Tax Rates: 898thNicest Citizens: 909thSafest: 1,094thLargest Governments: 1,333rdMost Rebellious Youth: 1,350thLeast Corrupt Governments: 1,351stMost Cheerful Citizens: 1,375thMost Inclusive: 1,650thMost Developed: 1,716thMost Beautiful Environments: 1,843rdHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 1,845thLongest Average Lifespans: 1,991stHighest Food Quality: 2,042ndMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 2,132ndLowest Crime Rates: 2,326thBest Weather: 2,400thHealthiest Citizens: 2,688thMost Cultured: 2,789thTop
5%
Smartest Citizens: 3,804thHighest Poor Incomes: 6,504thHighest Economic Output: 8,963rdMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 9,445thMost Secular: 9,920thMost Subsidized Industry: 10,108thHighest Average Incomes: 14,292ndTop
10%
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 16,169thLargest Populations: 28,060th
Top
1%
Most Advanced Public Transport: 6th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 7th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 8th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 15th in the regionMost Pacifist: 15th in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 16th in the regionNicest Citizens: 16th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 18th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 20th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 21st in the regionSafest: 23rd in the regionLargest Governments: 37th in the regionLeast Corrupt Governments: 41st in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 42nd in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 47th in the regionMost Inclusive: 50th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 52nd in the regionMost Developed: 53rd in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 59th in the regionHighest Food Quality: 64th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 70th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 77th in the regionBest Weather: 85th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 100th in the regionTop
5%
Most Cultured: 106th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 115th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 151st in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 315th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 339th in the regionMost Influential: 442nd in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 461st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 487th in the regionTop
10%
Most Secular: 528th in the regionMost Stationary: 545th in the regionLargest Populations: 866th in the regionNudest: 1,028th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Sowjet Union, mantis shrimp studies is academia's fastest-growing field.
  • : Following new legislation in Sowjet Union, Leader's reputation is hard as nails.
  • : Following new legislation in Sowjet Union, where there's smoke there's the Sowjet Unionian Forestry Department.
  • : Following new legislation in Sowjet Union, one tree's worth of paperwork accompanies each imported log of timber.
  • : Following new legislation in Sowjet Union, racehorses move a lot slower these days.
  • : Following new legislation in Sowjet Union, convicted criminals are given free limo rides to jail.
  • : Following new legislation in Sowjet Union, 'Police Academy 36' and 'Sharknados On A Plane' are vying for top spot at the box-office.
  • : Sowjet Union was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Populations.
  • : Following new legislation in Sowjet Union, the media seems excessively interested in what Leader is wearing this season.
  • : Following new legislation in Sowjet Union, everyone suspects that everyone else is a terrorist.

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