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The Guinness of St James Gate Brewery

“Guinness Is Good For You”

Category: Capitalist Paradise
Civil Rights:
Very Good
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Some

Regional Influence: Ambassador

Location: Ireland

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

St James Gate Brewery

Population14.07 billion

CapitalDublin
LeaderArthur Guinness
FaithGuinness

Currencyirish pound
Animaltoucan

The Guinness of St James Gate Brewery is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Arthur Guinness with an even hand, and remarkable for its national health service, unlimited-speed roads, and restrictive gun laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working population of 14.07 billion St James Gate Breweryians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Dublin. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 66.5%.

The frighteningly efficient St James Gate Breweryian economy, worth a remarkable 3,576 trillion irish pounds a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an amazing 254,226 irish pounds, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 983,106 per year while the poor average 45,111, a ratio of 21.8 to 1.

Nature magazines featuring stick insects on their covers are sometimes mistaken for fashion magazines, teachers regularly paddle unruly students, fewer people are bathing as citizens must show ration stamps before they can turn on their faucets, and translators have been hired to deal with the varying regional accents during national political debates. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. St James Gate Brewery's national animal is the toucan, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Guinness.

St James Gate Brewery is ranked 4,371st in the world and 1st in Ireland for Rudest Citizens, with 152.24 Insults Per Minute.

Top
1%
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 717thLargest Retail Industry: 1,242ndMost Rebellious Youth: 1,665thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1,947thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1,990thTop
5%
Most Efficient Economies: 2,490thLargest Black Market: 2,576thHighest Average Incomes: 3,217thHighest Economic Output: 3,252ndMost Developed: 4,226thMost Subsidized Industry: 4,324thRudest Citizens: 4,371stLargest Publishing Industry: 4,670thSmartest Citizens: 4,722ndLargest Cheese Export Sector: 4,768thMost Scientifically Advanced: 5,720thLargest Information Technology Sector: 6,500thLargest Governments: 6,679thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 6,706thMost Advanced Public Education: 7,571stLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 7,724thMost Corrupt Governments: 7,799thHighest Disposable Incomes: 9,079thMost Valuable International Artwork: 10,407thTop
10%
Highest Foreign Aid Spending: 11,035thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 11,196thLargest Gambling Industry: 11,598thLongest Average Lifespans: 13,310thHealthiest Citizens: 13,544thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 15,300thMost Secular: 15,806thLargest Populations: 16,204thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 18,781stHighest Drug Use: 18,859th
Top
10%
Largest Retail Industry: 1st in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Developed: 1st in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 1st in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 1st in the regionRudest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1st in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in St James Gate Brewery, translators have been hired to deal with the varying regional accents during national political debates.
  • : Following new legislation in St James Gate Brewery, fewer people are bathing as citizens must show ration stamps before they can turn on their faucets.
  • : Following new legislation in St James Gate Brewery, teachers regularly paddle unruly students.
  • : Following new legislation in St James Gate Brewery, nature magazines featuring stick insects on their covers are sometimes mistaken for fashion magazines.
  • : Following new legislation in St James Gate Brewery, the reams of paperwork accompanying any electronic item are a recognised contributor to national deforestation.
  • : Following new legislation in St James Gate Brewery, town nameplates frequently raise giggles from passing tourists.
  • : Following new legislation in St James Gate Brewery, 4-year-olds studying for their mathematics exams are anxious that they will be unemployable in adulthood if they fail.
  • : Following new legislation in St James Gate Brewery, teenage male videogamers often suffer repetitive strain wrist injuries.
  • : St James Gate Brewery was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Extensive Public Healthcare.
  • : Following new legislation in St James Gate Brewery, the government's suicide hotline now redirects callers to local tax lawyers.

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