The Spot on the Earth of Swartkrans is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, notable for its complete lack of prisons, free-roaming dinosaurs, and smutty television. The hard-nosed, humorless, devout population of 31.169 billion Swartkransians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The enormous, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Swartkrans. The average income tax rate is 96.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Swartkransian economy, worth a remarkable 4,524 trillion rand a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized, quite specialized black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Uranium Mining. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 145,174 rand, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.4 times as much as the poorest.

It is illegal to brush crumbs off your clothing outdoors, the colors pink and purple are banned from military unit insignia, school plays were recently banned due to concerns of child endangerment, and ambulances aren't allowed to overtake hearses. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Swartkrans's national animal is the Elephant, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Swartkrans is ranked 9,408^th in the world and 614^th in Lazarus for Lowest Crime Rates, with 102.18 law-abiding acts per hour.