by Max Barry

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The Democratic Republic of Sybaritic Socialists

“pigs is yer style”

Category: New York Times Democracy
Civil Rights:
Very Strong
Political Freedoms:

Regional Influence: Apprentice

Location: Europe


Sybaritic Socialists

Population32.103 billion

LeaderAll Smuggest


The Democratic Republic of Sybaritic Socialists is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by All Smuggest with a fair hand, and notable for its sprawling nuclear power plants, unlimited-speed roads, and daily referendums. The hard-nosed, democratic, cheerful population of 32.103 billion Sybaritic Socialistsians enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The relatively small, outspoken government is dominated by the Department of Education, although Healthcare is also considered important, while Spirituality and Defense receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kippenheim. The average income tax rate is 5.7%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The very strong Sybaritic Socialistsian economy, worth a remarkable 6,751 trillion mebbes a year, is fairly diversified and dominated by the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining, Retail, and Soda Sales. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an amazing 210,310 mebbes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The fire protection service is wholly government-funded, teenagers performing appendectomies on their friends has become a popular schoolyard prank, Ollie the Oiled Seal welcomes throngs of tourists to the newly opened Oil Oasis Water Park, and the Sybaritic Socialistsian Arts Council pays teenagers to sit through opera performances. Crime is totally unknown. Sybaritic Socialists's national animal is the lurcher, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Sybaritic Socialists is ranked 67,008th in the world and 425th in Europe for Largest Agricultural Sector, scoring 2,983.54 on the Mu-Bah-Daggs Productivity Index.

Largest Publishing Industry: 87thMost Influential: 140thMost Cheerful Citizens: 339thSmartest Citizens: 508thFattest Citizens: 911thMost Cultured: 917thMost Rebellious Youth: 997thHighest Economic Output: 1,055thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1,174thMost Advanced Public Education: 1,446thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 1,512thLargest Populations: 1,671stHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,707thHighest Disposable Incomes: 1,713thLargest Mining Sector: 1,731stMost Pacifist: 2,195thTop
Highest Poor Incomes: 2,754thLeast Corrupt Governments: 2,777thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 2,892ndLargest Retail Industry: 3,582ndLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 3,949thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 4,068thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 5,184thHighest Average Incomes: 5,488thMost Scientifically Advanced: 6,782ndLowest Crime Rates: 10,013thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 10,486thTop
Largest Governments: 11,816thNicest Citizens: 14,619thMost Politically Free: 16,208thMost Secular: 16,767thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 21,830th
Largest Publishing Industry: 2nd in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 8th in the regionLargest Populations: 9th in the regionFattest Citizens: 10th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 10th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 11th in the regionTop
Highest Economic Output: 13th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 16th in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 17th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 18th in the regionMost Politically Free: 19th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 20th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 22nd in the regionMost Cultured: 23rd in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 25th in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 28th in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 30th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 35th in the regionMost Pacifist: 40th in the regionLeast Corrupt Governments: 42nd in the regionMost Influential: 44th in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 46th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 49th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 53rd in the regionTop
Nudest: 84th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 86th in the regionMost Avoided: 90th in the region

National Happenings

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