by Max Barry

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National Flag

The Empire of Teedemous

“Gun, Load, Kill”

Category: Capitalist Paradise
Civil Rights:
Some
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Some

Regional Influence: Shoeshiner

Location: the South Pacific

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Teedemous

Population1.072 billion

CapitalBerlin
LeaderTee Sheps

CurrencyTea
Animalfish

The Empire of Teedemous is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Tee Sheps with an even hand, and renowned for its triple-decker prams, enslaved workforce, and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working population of 1.072 billion Teemonians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The relatively small, corrupt government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Industry, Law & Order, and Administration also on the agenda, while Spirituality and Environment receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Berlin. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 11.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Teedemousian economy, worth 131 trillion Teas a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Automobile Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Retail. Average income is an impressive 122,632 Teas, with the richest citizens earning 7.0 times as much as the poorest.

Teenage girls in knee-length surfer shorts have become a cultural icon of Teedemous, penurious citizens die from easily remedied ailments because they aren't 'taking enough initiative', folk are absolutely certain that you can never be absolutely certain, and condos feature wall-mounted cages containing endangered animals. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Teedemous's national animal is the fish, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to heavy metals seepage into national waterways.

Teedemous is ranked 165,781st in the world and 6,895th in the South Pacific for Most Cultured, scoring 49 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.

Top
5%
Most Armed: 2,521stLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 2,561stMost World Assembly Endorsements: 2,576thFattest Citizens: 3,712thMost Influential: 3,894thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 5,018thMost Avoided: 5,291stHighest Disposable Incomes: 5,297thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 6,121stLargest Mining Sector: 6,167thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 6,927thTop
10%
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 8,603rdLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 9,192ndLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 9,450thLargest Retail Industry: 10,667thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 12,545thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 13,989thMost Secular: 14,156thMost Corrupt Governments: 16,694th
Top
1%
Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 39th in the regionMost Armed: 54th in the regionTop
5%
Fattest Citizens: 76th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 110th in the regionMost Avoided: 114th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 118th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 122nd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 146th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 147th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 237th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 267th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 280th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 289th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 300th in the regionTop
10%
Most Corrupt Governments: 416th in the regionMost Influential: 419th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 438th in the regionMost Secular: 483rd in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 544th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 546th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 554th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 563rd in the regionLargest Black Market: 647th in the region

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