by Max Barry

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The Sawtooth Badlands of The Black Cathedral

“Feed them to the grinding wheel!” Warchieftain Carolus Ironhorse

Category: Iron Fist Consumerists
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Regional Influence: Page

Location: The North Pacific


The Black Cathedral

Population2.351 billion

LeaderWarchieftain Carolus Ironhorse
FaithBlackened Orthodoxy


The Sawtooth Badlands of The Black Cathedral is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Warchieftain Carolus Ironhorse with an iron fist, and notable for its keen interest in outer space, anti-smoking policies, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 2.351 billion Sawteeth are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Law & Order and Spirituality also on the agenda, while Welfare and International Aid receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Keruke. The average income tax rate is 91.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Sawtooth economy, worth 812 trillion Gallons a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, and Woodchip Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 345,501 Gallons, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

Games of cops and robbers typically end in at least one fatal shooting, the Ministry of Truthiness now manages the entire media industry, the tenet of free speech is held dear, and taking a walk on the wild side is punishable by death. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Black Cathedral's national animal is the Gormling, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Blackened Orthodoxy.

The Black Cathedral is ranked 109,563rd in the world and 5,776th in The North Pacific for Largest Publishing Industry, scoring 521.01 on the Bella Potter Productivity e-Index.

Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 85thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 157thMost Devout: 302ndMost Advanced Defense Forces: 311thMost Influential: 525thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 584thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 640thHighest Poor Incomes: 788thLargest Mining Sector: 846thMost Corrupt Governments: 848thHighest Average Incomes: 996thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,115thLargest Black Market: 1,121stLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,232ndMost Avoided: 1,482ndTop
Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 2,462ndLargest Insurance Industry: 2,711thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 3,864thLargest Governments: 4,345thRudest Citizens: 4,405thLowest Crime Rates: 4,429thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 5,363rdFattest Citizens: 5,820thMost Conservative: 6,588thHighest Average Tax Rates: 6,880thLargest Agricultural Sector: 7,276thTop
Most Subsidized Industry: 8,686thMost Efficient Economies: 10,357thLargest Retail Industry: 14,322ndLargest Cheese Export Sector: 15,157thLargest Gambling Industry: 15,257thMost Authoritarian: 15,638thMost Ignorant Citizens: 15,861stMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 16,337th
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 5th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 6th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 15th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 16th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 17th in the regionMost Devout: 18th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 30th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 31st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 32nd in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 37th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 37th in the regionLargest Black Market: 41st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 47th in the regionMost Avoided: 49th in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 70th in the regionTop
Largest Insurance Industry: 104th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 132nd in the regionMost Influential: 169th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 191st in the regionFattest Citizens: 201st in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 206th in the regionLargest Governments: 207th in the regionRudest Citizens: 249th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 315th in the regionMost Conservative: 366th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 390th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 396th in the regionTop
Most Efficient Economies: 507th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 579th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 627th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 646th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 776th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 786th in the region

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