The Colony of The Colony of The Colony of The Colony is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Colonial Colonel Columbus with an iron fist, and renowned for its pith helmet sales, triple-decker prams, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 6.854 billion Colonians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Spirituality. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of City of the colony. The average income tax rate is 68.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Colonian economy, worth 834 trillion Colony Coins a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, quite specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Trout Farming, and Basket Weaving. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 121,756 Colony Coins, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Tourists are denied entry because of a distant relative married to a Lilliputian, organ donation is compulsory, the nation is committed to nuclear rearmament, and soldiers' positions are given away by the glint of their bayonets. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force. The Colony of The Colony's national animal is the Animal of the colony, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is The Colony.

The Colony of The Colony is ranked 79,764^th in the world and 4^th in Murkton for Lowest Crime Rates, with 68.58 law-abiding acts per hour.