The Grand Empire of The Pop Punk Union is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Tom DeLonge with a fair hand, and remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, otherworldly petting zoo, and keen interest in outer space. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 1.964 billion Pop Punkers enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Pop Punk Paradise. The average income tax rate is 86.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Pop Punk Unionian economy, worth 287 trillion blink-182s a year, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 146,257 blink-182s, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government is deliberately installing bloatware onto computers, jabbing a baby's bottle at officials gets parents waved straight through immigration, the government has instituted 'traveller reservations' across the country, and people seem disproportionately distraught when told a museum has a phones-off policy. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Pop Punk Union's national animal is the Alien, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

The Pop Punk Union is ranked 200,519^th in the world and 2^nd in The Rock World of Pop Punk and Friends for Most Primitive, scoring -434.71 on the Scary Big Number Scale.