by Max Barry

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The Potato-Poet of The Salaxalans

“Two potatoes for all!”

Category: New York Times Democracy
Civil Rights:
Political Freedoms:

Regional Influence: Power

Location: Spiritus


The Salaxalans

Population16.634 billion

LeaderSvlad Cjelli

AnimalElectric Monk

The Potato-Poet of The Salaxalans is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Svlad Cjelli with a fair hand, and remarkable for its avant-garde cinema, public floggings, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful, devout population of 16.634 billion Salaxians enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The enormous, outspoken government prioritizes Education, with Environment, Social Policy, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while Spirituality receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Rime. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Salaxalansian economy, worth a remarkable 3,885 trillion Dirks a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Information Technology. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 233,582 Dirks, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Decongestants have replaced Dirks in street transactions, third world countries are rich in "I Love Rime" t-shirts, both diets and economic output are growing leaner with recent restrictions to free trade, and police regularly arrest families playing Monopoly. Crime is totally unknown. The Salaxalans's national animal is the Electric Monk, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Chronology.

The Salaxalans is ranked 28,578th in the world and 67th in Spiritus for Largest Information Technology Sector, scoring 10,868.95 on the Fann-Boi Productivity Index.

Most Influential: 68thMost Valuable International Artwork: 169thMost Rebellious Youth: 185thMost Advanced Public Transport: 327thMost Cultured: 425thMost Advanced Public Education: 547thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 561stMost Cheerful Citizens: 607thLargest Publishing Industry: 722ndSmartest Citizens: 806thMost Beautiful Environments: 817thLeast Corrupt Governments: 826thHighest Average Tax Rates: 862ndMost Pacifist: 875thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 918thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 923rdMost Developed: 987thHealthiest Citizens: 1,019thLargest Governments: 1,027thLongest Average Lifespans: 1,205thNicest Citizens: 1,238thLargest Welfare Programs: 1,257thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1,274thMost Compassionate Citizens: 1,784thBest Weather: 2,010thMost Stationary: 2,195thHighest Poor Incomes: 2,249thTop
Highest Economic Output: 2,680thSafest: 3,026thMost Devout: 3,455thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 3,601stHighest Average Incomes: 4,152ndMost Inclusive: 5,520thMost Subsidized Industry: 8,228thLargest Populations: 9,299thLowest Crime Rates: 11,752ndTop
Most Scientifically Advanced: 12,522ndMost Efficient Economies: 19,178thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 19,853rd
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 1st in the regionMost Influential: 1st in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 2nd in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 3rd in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 3rd in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 3rd in the regionMost Stationary: 3rd in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 3rd in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 3rd in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 4th in the regionMost Developed: 4th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 4th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 4th in the regionMost Cultured: 4th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 4th in the regionLeast Corrupt Governments: 4th in the regionTop
Smartest Citizens: 5th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 5th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 6th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 6th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 6th in the regionLargest Governments: 6th in the regionMost Pacifist: 6th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 6th in the regionBest Weather: 7th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 8th in the regionNicest Citizens: 9th in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 11th in the regionMost Devout: 12th in the regionLargest Populations: 13th in the regionSafest: 13th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 13th in the regionMost Inclusive: 17th in the regionTop
Most Subsidized Industry: 26th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 35th in the regionNudest: 36th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 37th in the regionMost Politically Free: 38th in the region

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