by Max Barry

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National Flag

The Lore of Thneedtown

“Thou Shalt Go Forth And Fornicate With Thyself” Ebeziah Muji

Category: New York Times Democracy
Civil Rights:
Political Freedoms:

Regional Influence: Shoeshiner

Location: The North Pacific



Population13.808 billion

LeaderEbeziah Muji
FaithNine Divines


The Lore of Thneedtown is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Ebeziah Muji with a fair hand, and renowned for its ubiquitous missile silos, keen interest in outer space, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic, devout population of 13.808 billion Thneedans enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The enormous, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Zirotler. The average income tax rate is 85.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Thneed economy, worth a remarkable 1,546 trillion Gekans a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Information Technology. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 112,033 Gekans, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Foreign football clubs wave the Thneed flag before every game, restaurants are required to specify whether their toilet paper was made in Thneedtown, foreign policy is to avoid standing up to bullies, and the news is showing footage of Ebeziah Muji bullying an old man to the point of tears. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Thneedtown's national animal is the Totar, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Nine Divines.

Thneedtown is ranked 224,728th in the world and 8,928th in The North Pacific for Fattest Citizens, with 6.45 Obesity Rate.

Most World Assembly Endorsements: 2,044thTop
Most Influential: 2,798thBest Weather: 3,157thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 3,806thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 3,935thMost Beautiful Environments: 4,359thMost Rebellious Youth: 4,485thLeast Corrupt Governments: 4,640thLargest Publishing Industry: 4,753rdHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 5,425thMost Cheerful Citizens: 5,482ndMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 5,765thMost Valuable International Artwork: 5,773rdMost Advanced Public Education: 7,399thSafest: 7,730thMost Cultured: 8,110thLongest Average Lifespans: 8,139thMost Advanced Public Transport: 8,254thMost Pacifist: 8,357thNicest Citizens: 8,632ndHealthiest Citizens: 8,958thMost Developed: 9,161stMost Compassionate Citizens: 9,562ndMost Inclusive: 11,216thHighest Economic Output: 11,481stMost Subsidized Industry: 11,637thHighest Average Tax Rates: 12,020thTop
Smartest Citizens: 12,129thHighest Poor Incomes: 13,759thLargest Governments: 14,718thMost Efficient Economies: 14,844thLargest Populations: 19,547thLowest Crime Rates: 23,822ndMost Scientifically Advanced: 23,876th
Most Rebellious Youth: 179th in the regionBest Weather: 196th in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 200th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 203rd in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 223rd in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 232nd in the regionLeast Corrupt Governments: 258th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 262nd in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 274th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 341st in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 346th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 374th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 389th in the regionMost Cultured: 414th in the regionLargest Populations: 434th in the regionSafest: 445th in the regionMost Pacifist: 485th in the regionTop
Nicest Citizens: 497th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 506th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 529th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 538th in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 546th in the regionMost Developed: 561st in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 599th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 651st in the regionMost Inclusive: 660th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 664th in the regionLargest Governments: 754th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 774th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 782nd in the regionMost Politically Free: 862nd in the regionMost Influential: 904th in the region

National Happenings

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World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 112 » Venicea, Bankowiata, Hamerica, Loutsland, Ellbonnia, Illusia and Neverendia, Lulubellia, Aerilia, Libvillia, Orado, Great Bights Mum, Malta Comino Gozo, Shibutani, Runeda, Guer Aike, Selfgradatude, Dreadton, Bharathvarsh, Corfad, Ethnon, Fraystonia, Tringapore, Republica Guilleana, The Rhein States, Votak Matim, Former English Colony, Notyoutopia, Eri-Maqa-Ena, Yaorozu, Eternal Dominion, Territorio di Nessuno, Cretox State, Merconitonitopia, Svenskskit, Hardscrabble, Zzozona, Andanavia, Koda-Land, Omnistria, Aryan Homeland, Wilkshire, Climeria, Xagill, Xentherida, Dangine, Card Kingdom, Seanat, Novremia, El Fiji Grande, Siwale, and 62 others.Muqatil, Defense For The World Assembly, McMasterdonia, Planes, Yellops, Sunto, Yokciq Empire, Frances Francis the First of France, Interdimensional Zone, Francois Isidore, Jaxikistan, Pasargad, Kastonvia, New Lakemba, Madjack, Steampunk Ariel, Greater Ale Permars, Kragsgale, Sikol, Dar es Saalam, The Tampa Bay Rays, Super Girl, Tyirza, The Mazur Empire, Nodnarb, Kranostav, North Bratislava, Valentine Z, Empy, Wineclaw, The Democratic Kingdom Of Skaraborg, Ariele, Sil Dorsett, Sopernia, Bearical, Unshleepd, Tsandonown, Que Lukustinardon, Figyjharli, The Pantheons, Pallaith, Outer Shenendoah, The Calabash Protectorate, Lionia, Blyskalia, Capablanca, Sahriastan, ROM, Vesteysia, Tibus Heth, Aruvicion, Nimarya, Chips and Guac, Simone Republic, Pazair, Praeceps, New Celoveniortan, Palgo, Dabarastan, Cam Zazi, AmManies, and Mon Island.

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