The Free-Market Paradise of Toneaya is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by The Most Prestigious Sir Lord Tony with an even hand, and remarkable for its sprawling nuclear power plants, otherworldly petting zoo, and complete lack of public education. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless population of 16.822 billion Toneayans enjoy some of the most opulent lifestyles in the region, unless they are unemployed or working-class, in which case they are variously starving to death or crippled by easily preventable diseases.

The minute, corrupt, liberal, pro-business government, or what there is of one, is primarily concerned with Industry, although Defense is also considered important, while Environment and Law & Order receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Hoboken. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Toneayan economy, worth a remarkable 4,503 trillion Porta-Johns a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Gambling, Arms Manufacturing, and Soda Sales. Average income is an amazing 267,721 Porta-Johns, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,429,526 per year while the poor average 3,427, a ratio of 708 to 1.

Brown Sugar 101 is a popular course at community colleges, children gain their first sex education from reading the dictionary, cigarettes are dead-cheap, and every spring railroad foundations erode to reveal human remains. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, probably because of the absence of a police force. Toneaya's national animal is the Cuttlefish, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Toneayanism.

Toneaya is ranked 340,768^th in the world and 2^nd in Streptococcus for Lowest Crime Rates, with 2.83 law-abiding acts per hour.