by Max Barry

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Spotlight on:

National Flag

The Armed Republic of Toniland

“You need proper headings”

Category: Corporate Police State
Civil Rights:
Political Freedoms:
Unheard Of

Regional Influence: Shoeshiner

Location: The North Pacific



Population1.361 billion


The Armed Republic of Toniland is a massive, orderly nation, remarkable for its zero percent divorce rate, free-roaming dinosaurs, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 1.361 billion Tonilandians are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, pro-business, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Law & Order and Industry are also considered important, while Environment and Social Policy are ignored. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 37.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Tonilandian economy, worth 197 trillion Cowbells a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Automobile Manufacturing, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an impressive 145,060 Cowbells, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 706,640 per year while the poor average 17,160, a ratio of 41.2 to 1.

Toddler groups haven taken over local libraries, obesity is a thing of the past due to the nation's sickening cuisine, several citizens have complained about scientists abducting their pets for experimentation, and citizens who become homeless are immediately executed. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force. Toniland's national animal is the Hedgehog, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Toniland is ranked 1,200th in the world and 788th in The North Pacific for Most World Assembly Endorsements, with 127 Valid Endorsements.

Most World Assembly Endorsements: 1,200thTop
Most Armed: 1,849thMost Ignorant Citizens: 1,902ndLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2,024thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2,248thFattest Citizens: 2,270thMost Influential: 2,273rdHighest Wealthy Incomes: 2,591stHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 2,894thMost Avoided: 3,019thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 3,025thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 3,547thMost Corrupt Governments: 3,652ndMost Conservative: 3,728thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 4,705thMost Devout: 5,544thLargest Black Market: 7,459thHighest Disposable Incomes: 7,523rdLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 7,526thLargest Retail Industry: 8,306thTop
Greatest Rich-Poor Divides: 9,745thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 10,112thMost Extreme: 12,954thLargest Mining Sector: 13,193rdHighest Average Incomes: 13,562ndMost Efficient Economies: 13,846th
Most Armed: 59th in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 69th in the regionFattest Citizens: 79th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 81st in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 82nd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 84th in the regionTop
Highest Unexpected Death Rate: 93rd in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 97th in the regionMost Avoided: 104th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 121st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 135th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 173rd in the regionLargest Black Market: 206th in the regionMost Devout: 217th in the regionMost Conservative: 225th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 302nd in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 317th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 373rd in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 385th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 391st in the regionTop
Most Extreme: 499th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 507th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 660th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 682nd in the regionMost Pro-Market: 720th in the regionMost Influential: 721st in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 770th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 788th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 824th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Toniland was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Largest Retail Industry.
  • : Following new legislation in Toniland, citizens who become homeless are immediately executed.
  • : Following new legislation in Toniland, several citizens have complained about scientists abducting their pets for experimentation.
  • : Following new legislation in Toniland, obesity is a thing of the past due to the nation's sickening cuisine.
  • : Following new legislation in Toniland, toddler groups haven taken over local libraries.
  • : Toniland was endorsed by The Queendom of Eravonia.
  • : Following new legislation in Toniland, government popup ads are springing up like weeds.
  • : Following new legislation in Toniland, the government advises foreign diplomats to speak softly and carry a big bag of cash.
  • : Following new legislation in Toniland, children are terrified that the 'flying police monster' will come to take them away in the night.
  • : Following new legislation in Toniland, advertisers scramble to sponsor the broadcast of Leader's most personal functions.


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 127 » Territorio di Nessuno, Shibutani, Zemnaya Svoboda, Alunya, Acrabinnia, Siwale, Pallaith, Corfad, Shin-Hachioji, El Fiji Grande, Sinelona, The Rhein States, Omnistria, Ethnon, Steampunk Ariel, Koda-Land, Saturns Edge, Great Bights Mum, Shadowrik, Kwaj, Maott, North Bratislava, Sil Dorsett, Napnomadia, PlanetPunk, Notyoutopia, New Pruessen, Spartoptia, United Draconia, Q w e r t y, Yaorozu, Plangainer, Selfgradatude, Ninjak30, Eri-Maqa-Ena, Ibiscaton, Holy Oranz, Sundred, Guslantis, Frances Francis the First of France, Buckerino, Black Templares, Sunto, Steraz, Federation Terra Australis, Jasminlandia, Dreadton, New Bremerton, Dar es Saalam, Joodey, and 77 others.Haor Chall, Torakuen, Egalico, Trillius, Wineclaw, Guer Aike, General COE, Unimaginable Doom, Unsophisticate, Kasazzastan, Victoriaans Nederlands, 1 very fast endotarter, Pasargad, Ikea Rike, Moubarakistan, Aratani, Niradans, Destructive Government Endorsing System, Noahs Second Country, Valhalla123, Former English Colony, Test for a new hope, Alpinea, Wilkshire, Elder Realms, GRANDE IMPERIO ORIENTAL PAGAO EUDUARDO, Xentherida, Constantinolia, Astrind, Zumlandia, Kobagia, Loutsland, Glurponia, Xzavia-Hjar, Bearical, Orado, Penrith, Vincone Cae, Utopicican, Runeda, Daiz, Juggernautilus, The Tampa Bay Rays, Sockmanland, Makersaulache, Duerrlewang, Cuyan, McMasterdonia, New Octicarg, Orven, The Stratosphere Islands, Ponantine, Racoda, Wisconsota, The Nation that will win Soops for 9003, Fizban, Gnomewatchers, Amauri, Angshire, Miruma, Kranostav, Yukti, PotatoFarmers, Loli County, Nothru Lerple, Pazair, The Iron Lions, Seenvorland, Clan Spaniel, Dabarastan, United Kahndaq, United Anglo-America, Afcon, Viridiann, Zyvetskistaahn, Baldova, and Eravonia.

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