The Most Serene Republic of Torregal is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Róise Fitzgerald with an iron fist, and notable for its rum-swilling pirates, museums and concert halls, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, cynical, cheerful population of 17.286 billion Torregalese are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Port Láirge. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Torregalese economy, worth a remarkable 5,207 trillion punts a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is extremely specialized, is mostly made up of the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology. Average income is an amazing 301,272 punts, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

There's some really clean windows in Torregalese houses, funerals are often rudely interrupted by juggling clowns shouting for volunteers from the audience, left-wing militias train children how to properly burn down banks, and saying 'Hi Guys' to a mixed gender group of people at work is a fireable offense. Crime is totally unknown. Torregal's national animal is the raven, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Anarcha-feminism.

Torregal is ranked 312,539^th in the world and 3^rd in Holy Land for Most Primitive, scoring -604.15 on the Scary Big Number Scale.