by Max Barry

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The Grand Republic of Turds and Burglers

“The road to recovery is long and painful.” Levi Davis

Category: New York Times Democracy
Civil Rights:
Some
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Excellent

Regional Influence: Auxiliary

Location: The Turd Burglian Bloc

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Turds and Burglers

Population5.739 billion

CapitalThe Underground District of Knarvashka
LeaderLevi Davis
FaithWinklburgism

CurrencyTurds
AnimalEmu

The Grand Republic of Turds and Burglers is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Levi Davis with a fair hand, and renowned for its anti-smoking policies, zero percent divorce rate, and disturbing lack of elderly people. The hard-nosed, democratic, devout population of 5.739 billion Turds and Burglersians enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Underground District of Knarvashka. The average income tax rate is 90.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Turds and Burglersian economy, worth 912 trillion Turds a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Trout Farming, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 158,942 Turds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.4 times as much as the poorest.

Commemoration of the Great The Turd Burglian Bloc War costs almost as much as the war itself, national stress about the waning heir-line is causing a rise in alopecia, sofas are perpetually on sales that Must End Soon, and royals are always ready with their diamond-encrusted toilet plungers in case a royal flush doesn't work. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Turds and Burglers's national animal is the Emu, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Winklburgism.

Turds and Burglers is ranked 93,305th in the world and 2nd in The Turd Burglian Bloc for Most Pro-Market, scoring 43.44 on the Rand Index.

Top
1%
Most Devout: 1,500thTop
5%
Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 3,981stMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 5,144thLowest Crime Rates: 5,482ndMost Cultured: 5,708thRudest Citizens: 5,885thMost Subsidized Industry: 6,098thMost Efficient Economies: 6,987thLargest Governments: 7,192ndHighest Average Tax Rates: 8,069thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 8,356thTop
10%
Largest Publishing Industry: 8,962ndMost Advanced Defense Forces: 9,642ndMost Advanced Public Education: 9,749thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 10,283rdSafest: 10,701stLargest Retail Industry: 10,776thHighest Average Incomes: 10,823rdMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 11,603rdMost Beautiful Environments: 11,679thHealthiest Citizens: 12,216thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 12,977thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 13,724thSmartest Citizens: 14,332ndLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 14,523rdLargest Agricultural Sector: 15,325thMost Corrupt Governments: 15,819thHighest Economic Output: 16,148th

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