The People's Republic of Ump328 is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, notable for its pith helmet sales, suspicion of poets, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 4.673 billion Ump328ians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. The average income tax rate is 63.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Ump328ian economy, worth 822 trillion Platinums a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Uranium Mining. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 175,977 Platinums, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.2 times as much as the poorest.

Banning party poppers has been a real party pooper, the studies of art and philosophy are banned, the nation has always been at war with Moltovea, and lawyers spend as much time preparing their make-up as they do their briefs. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ump328's national animal is the Black Widow, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Ump328 is ranked 22,104^th in the world and 1,430^th in Osiris for Lowest Crime Rates, with 88.04 law-abiding acts per hour.