The Commonwealth of Ump342 is a massive, cultured nation, notable for its public floggings, free-roaming dinosaurs, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 4.671 billion Ump342ians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. The average income tax rate is 75.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Ump342ian economy, worth 906 trillion Platinums a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Woodchip Exports, and Uranium Mining. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 194,092 Platinums, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.2 times as much as the poorest.

All screens are equal but some are more equal than others, returning vacationers often find that their property is now a construction site, if you go into the woods today you're sure of a big surprise, and punk-rockers and girl-bands are united in their loss of fashion statements. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ump342's national animal is the Black Widow, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Ump342 is ranked 12,161^st in the world and 734^th in Balder for Lowest Crime Rates, with 97.56 law-abiding acts per hour.