by Max Barry

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Spotlight on:

National Flag

The Republic of United Soviet States of Bacon

“We sell bacon and bacon accessories”

Category: Father Knows Best State
Civil Rights:
Political Freedoms:

Regional Influence: Squire

Location: Lazarus


United Soviet States of Bacon

Population9.415 billion

CapitalSoviet Bacon City
LeaderPrime Minister Hypnos


The Republic of United Soviet States of Bacon is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Prime Minister Hypnos with an iron fist, and remarkable for its frequent executions, vat-grown people, and sprawling nuclear power plants. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 9.415 billion Baconians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The relatively small, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Soviet Bacon City. The average income tax rate is 9.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Baconian economy, worth a remarkable 1,719 trillion Bacons a year, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Gambling, and Retail. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an impressive 182,593 Bacons, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.2 times as much as the poorest.

The government mails weekly updates on the new anti-junk mail laws to every citizen, pet loving officers arrest citizens who don't give their dogs enough biscuits, only vaccinated citizens may have free healthcare, and terrorists who are 17th cousins with the ex-wives of half-brothers of citizens are now exempt from the immigration ban. Crime, especially youth-related, is pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. United Soviet States of Bacon's national animal is the Pig, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

United Soviet States of Bacon is ranked 13,596th in the world and 638th in Lazarus for Largest Mining Sector, scoring 7,559.7 on the Blue Sky Asbestos Index.

Most Armed: 1,338thLargest Gambling Industry: 1,454thLargest Agricultural Sector: 1,670thFattest Citizens: 1,800thTop
Most Avoided: 2,263rdHighest Disposable Incomes: 2,518thHighest Crime Rates: 2,656thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 2,739thLargest Black Market: 3,590thMost Corrupt Governments: 3,758thMost Influential: 3,960thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 4,301stLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 4,469thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 4,619thLargest Information Technology Sector: 5,065thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 5,222ndLargest Manufacturing Sector: 5,646thLargest Retail Industry: 6,324thMost Scientifically Advanced: 6,462ndNudest: 6,525thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 8,030thHighest Average Incomes: 8,072ndHighest Economic Output: 8,905thMost Secular: 9,464thHighest Poor Incomes: 10,023rdRudest Citizens: 10,170thTop
Most Advanced Defense Forces: 11,750thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 13,429thLargest Mining Sector: 13,596thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 14,682ndMost Rebellious Youth: 18,339thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 18,674thHighest Drug Use: 19,844thMost Advanced Public Education: 19,887thMost Efficient Economies: 20,546th
Most Armed: 45th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 75th in the regionTop
Largest Gambling Industry: 84th in the regionFattest Citizens: 89th in the regionMost Avoided: 121st in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 136th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 141st in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 142nd in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 145th in the regionMost Influential: 149th in the regionLargest Black Market: 208th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 218th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 222nd in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 232nd in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 243rd in the regionNudest: 272nd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 280th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 303rd in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 322nd in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 353rd in the regionTop
Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 407th in the regionRudest Citizens: 419th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 432nd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 442nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 461st in the regionMost Secular: 502nd in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 551st in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 636th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 638th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 750th in the region

National Happenings

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