by Max Barry

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The Murabian Protectorate of Unthank

“Beware!”

Category: Capitalist Paradise
Civil Rights:
Excellent
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Average

Regional Influence: Superpower

Location: Commonwealth of Saint Norm

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Unthank

Population7.81 billion

CapitalUnthank
LeaderLord Provost Lanark

Currencycopper
Animaldragon

The Murabian Protectorate of Unthank is a colossal, socially progressive nation, ruled by Lord Provost Lanark with an even hand, and remarkable for its deadly medical pandemics, smutty television, and public floggings. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 7.81 billion Unthankics are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business government, or what there is of one, prioritizes Industry, with Spirituality also on the agenda, while Law & Order and Environment receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Unthank. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Unthankful economy, worth a remarkable 2,527 trillion coppers a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with significant contributions from Gambling, Soda Sales, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an amazing 323,561 coppers, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,417,876 per year while the poor average 46,504, a ratio of 30.5 to 1.

The people's love for Lord Provost Lanark is little more than self-preservation, citizens are encouraged to show displeasure with politicians by poking them with sharp metal sticks, uprooting flowers for religious ceremonies is a felony, and angry disenfranchised AIs attempt to hijack the bodies of comatose hospital patients. Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Unthank's national animal is the dragon, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Unthank is ranked 116,819th in the world and 1st in Commonwealth of Saint Norm for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring 1,049.39 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.

Top
1%
Largest Retail Industry: 32ndHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 37thHighest Crime Rates: 47thMost Devout: 63rdMost Armed: 66thMost Ignorant Citizens: 66thLargest Gambling Industry: 66thFattest Citizens: 69thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 78thRudest Citizens: 84thMost Avoided: 133rdLowest Overall Tax Burden: 237thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 309thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 367thMost Corrupt Governments: 374thLargest Insurance Industry: 443rdHighest Disposable Incomes: 529thMost Rebellious Youth: 536thLargest Mining Sector: 596thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 782ndHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1,019thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,224thHighest Average Incomes: 1,611thTop
5%
Most Efficient Economies: 3,269thMost Valuable International Artwork: 5,195thHighest Economic Output: 5,893rdTop
10%
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 15,311thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 16,697thLargest Black Market: 18,561stGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 22,127th

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Unthank, angry disenfranchised AIs attempt to hijack the bodies of comatose hospital patients.
  • : Following new legislation in Unthank, uprooting flowers for religious ceremonies is a felony.
  • : Following new legislation in Unthank, citizens are encouraged to show displeasure with politicians by poking them with sharp metal sticks.
  • : Following new legislation in Unthank, the people's love for Lord Provost Lanark is little more than self-preservation.
  • : Following new legislation in Unthank, children who can't memorize their multiplication tables are sent to the mines.
  • : Following new legislation in Unthank, environmental protestors are being rounded up and taken away in sinister black vans as a massive land development campaign gets underway.
  • : Following new legislation in Unthank, the education system is famed for its taxing exams.
  • : Following new legislation in Unthank, AIs are programmed to deliberately fail the Turing Test to make it easier for humans to turn them off.
  • : Unthank was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Greatest Rich-Poor Divides.
  • : Following new legislation in Unthank, the nation faces constant invasions by foreign boy bands.

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