by Max Barry

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The Gerontocratic Patriarchy of Upper Nowhere

“Do not destroy a good society in search of Utopia”

Category: Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
Civil Rights:
Excellent
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Very Good

Regional Influence: Duckspeaker

Location: The Hole To Hide In

OverviewFactbookPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Upper Nowhere

Population4.016 billion

CapitalKilminster
LeaderChristopher Lee
FaithScam

Currencyshilling
Animalhog-nosed bat

The Gerontocratic Patriarchy of Upper Nowhere is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Christopher Lee with an even hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, sprawling nuclear power plants, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working population of 4.016 billion Upper Nowhereans have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The relatively small, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kilminster. The average income tax rate is 34.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Upper Nowherean economy, worth a remarkable 1,103 trillion shillings a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Tourism, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is an amazing 274,825 shillings, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.7 times as much as the poorest.

Cooking with water and baking soda is considered patent infringement, becoming a missionary is a sure-fire route to martyrdom, cars speed down national highways while drivers sleep at the wheel, and tipsy fans frequently invite themselves to the board meetings of sports clubs. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Upper Nowhere's national animal is the hog-nosed bat, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Scam.

Upper Nowhere is ranked 104,953rd in the world and 70th in The Hole To Hide In for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring 1,221.17 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.

Top
1%
Most Valuable International Artwork: 127thRudest Citizens: 415thLargest Retail Industry: 631stLargest Agricultural Sector: 1,220thMost Secular: 1,652ndMost Efficient Economies: 1,916thMost Scientifically Advanced: 1,960thHighest Disposable Incomes: 2,018thLargest Information Technology Sector: 2,072ndSmartest Citizens: 2,131stTop
5%
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2,531stMost Developed: 2,617thHighest Average Incomes: 2,692ndLowest Crime Rates: 5,220thHighest Poor Incomes: 5,446thLargest Governments: 5,880thMost Influential: 6,058thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 6,352ndLargest Cheese Export Sector: 6,529thMost Subsidized Industry: 7,303rdLargest Publishing Industry: 7,768thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 9,122ndLongest Average Lifespans: 9,493rdMost Advanced Public Education: 10,823rdMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 11,460thTop
10%
Most Popular Tourist Destinations: 12,321stMost Cultured: 16,186thHighest Economic Output: 16,607thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 16,629thHealthiest Citizens: 16,871stLargest Soda Pop Sector: 17,806thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 18,045thMost Advanced Public Transport: 18,728thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 18,900thLargest Welfare Programs: 21,300thMost Corrupt Governments: 21,869thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 22,291stLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 22,329th
Top
1%
Most Valuable International Artwork: 1st in the regionTop
5%
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 3rd in the regionRudest Citizens: 3rd in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 3rd in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 3rd in the regionMost Secular: 4th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 4th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 4th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 4th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 4th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 5th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 5th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 6th in the regionMost Developed: 6th in the regionTop
10%
Largest Governments: 9th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 9th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 10th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 11th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 12th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 12th in the regionNudest: 13th in the regionMost Influential: 14th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 15th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Upper Nowhere, tipsy fans frequently invite themselves to the board meetings of sports clubs.
  • : Following new legislation in Upper Nowhere, cars speed down national highways while drivers sleep at the wheel.
  • : Following new legislation in Upper Nowhere, becoming a missionary is a sure-fire route to martyrdom.
  • : Following new legislation in Upper Nowhere, cooking with water and baking soda is considered patent infringement.
  • : Following new legislation in Upper Nowhere, a survey of the nation's rivers and children has shown that pesticide levels are at an all-time regional high.
  • : Following new legislation in Upper Nowhere, major boxing matches are held in government buildings.
  • : Following new legislation in Upper Nowhere, mantis shrimp studies is academia's fastest-growing field.
  • : Following new legislation in Upper Nowhere, skateparks can be found in every city.
  • : Upper Nowhere was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Trout Fishing Sector.
  • : Following new legislation in Upper Nowhere, scenic mountain valleys are flooded with water as damming projects get underway.

More...

World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 9 » Candensia, Exbrenia, Kynthes, Klusis, Rumanian States, Evacasia, Vennos, Nonadia, and South Easthern.

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