The Cannibalicracy of Vespertilia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Belpheghorhoth Gacek with a fair hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, daily referendums, and sprawling nuclear power plants. The hard-nosed, democratic, humorless population of 42.749 billion Vespertilians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The minute, liberal, outspoken government, or what there is of one, is dominated by the Department of Education, with Defense also on the agenda, while Law & Order and Spirituality receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ravendark. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Vespertilian economy, worth an astonishing 17,854 trillion Gaceks a year, is quite specialized and mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing and Book Publishing. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 417,657 Gaceks, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Posing for pictures is an integral part of military training, visitors to Graffiti Warrens National Park are offered a complimentary tetanus vaccination, every new building project has to undergo a five-year environmental impact study before it can go ahead, and property subletting is going underground. Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Vespertilia's national animal is the bat, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Vespertilia is ranked 316,393^rd in the world and 8^th in Poland for Most Primitive, scoring -1771.78 on the Scary Big Number Scale.