The República of Vientina is a colossal, socially progressive nation, ruled by Hans Woodsen with a fair hand, and renowned for its keen interest in outer space, aversion to nipples, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic, cheerful population of 5.919 billion Vientinans hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Astória. The average income tax rate is 86.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Vientinan economy, worth a remarkable 1,450 trillion Renzes a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Retail, and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 245,128 Renzes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.1 times as much as the poorest.

The demands of climate protestors are measured in spray-paint can sales, the government expresses surprisingly intense opinions on the use of whip pans, many marriages go virtually unconsummated, and at least 1% of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs budget goes to Hans Woodsen's wardrobe. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Vientina's national animal is the Angora Rabbit, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Vientina is ranked 314,107^th in the world and 1,525^th in Europe for Most Patriotic, with 0.4 flags saluted per person per day.