by Max Barry

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The Empire of Warthington

“Befreit von den Fesseln der Unterdrückung!” Kaiser Michael der I von Warthington

Category: Psychotic Dictatorship
Civil Rights:
Some
Economy:
All-Consuming
Political Freedoms:
Outlawed

Regional Influence: Handshaker

Location: Deutschland

OverviewFactbookDispatchesPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Warthington

Population5.605 billion

CapitalWarthington
LeaderKaiser Michael der I von Warthington
FaithCatholicism

CurrencyReichskrone
AnimalFalcon

The Empire of Warthington is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Kaiser Michael der I von Warthington with an iron fist, and remarkable for its smutty television, pith helmet sales, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 5.605 billion Warthingtonians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Warthington. The average income tax rate is 88.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Warthingtonian economy, worth 702 trillion Reichskrones a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Trout Farming industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Information Technology. Average income is an impressive 125,349 Reichskrones, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Prisons are filled with the cackles and sobs of a deranged inmate population, there has been a rapid increase of noise complaints over the sound of buzzing bees, the government has declared its commitment to multilateralism, and the only Maxxmas gift frontline troops receive from officers is a bullet with the enemy's name on it. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Warthington's national animal is the Falcon, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Catholicism.

Warthington is ranked 209,254th in the world and 45th in Deutschland for Nudest, with 15.75 Cheeks Per Square Mile.

Top
1%
Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 748thTop
5%
Most Advanced Law Enforcement: 4,348thLowest Crime Rates: 4,986thHighest Poor Incomes: 8,538thHighest Average Tax Rates: 9,506thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 9,692ndMost Advanced Public Transport: 10,024thMost Authoritarian: 10,206thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 10,253rdTop
10%
Largest Governments: 11,529thLargest Welfare Programs: 12,241stMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 14,077thSafest: 14,573rdLargest Publishing Industry: 14,867thLongest Average Lifespans: 14,983rdMost Cheerful Citizens: 15,228thMost Inclusive: 15,275thMost Cultured: 15,891stLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 17,293rdMost Income Equality: 17,651stMost Stationary: 18,616thMost Corrupt Governments: 19,418thMost Developed: 19,665thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 20,339thMost Advanced Public Education: 20,434thHighest Average Incomes: 20,599thMost Influential: 20,660thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 20,988th
Top
5%
Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 2nd in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 2nd in the regionTop
10%
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 3rd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 3rd in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 3rd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 4th in the regionLargest Governments: 4th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Warthington was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Subsidized Industry.
  • : Warthington was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Subsidized Industry.
  • : Warthington was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Subsidized Industry.
  • : Warthington was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Influential.
  • : Warthington lodged a message on the Deutschland Regional Message Board.
  • : Warthington was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Subsidized Industry.
  • : Warthington was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Authoritarian.
  • : Warthington was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Manufacturing Sector.
  • : Following new legislation in Warthington, the only Maxxmas gift frontline troops receive from officers is a bullet with the enemy's name on it.
  • : Following new legislation in Warthington, the government has declared its commitment to multilateralism.

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