The Glorious Empire of Woolitania is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by WooShell with a fair hand, and notable for its ritual sacrifices, complete lack of prisons, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 33.961 billion Woolitanians love a good election, and the government gives them plenty of them. Universities tend to be full of students debating the merits of various civil and political rights, while businesses are tightly regulated and the wealthy viewed with suspicion.

The tiny, socially-minded, outspoken government prioritizes Education, with Administration, Industry, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while Spirituality and Defense aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Woolitania City. The average income tax rate is 1.9%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Woolitanian economy, worth an astonishing 10,812 trillion woolians a year, is highly specialized and led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology and Tourism. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 318,384 woolians, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Dog breeding has been banned in accordance with recent animal experimentation laws, the main interest rates change daily based on the latest news story, mantis shrimp studies is academia's fastest-growing field, and the Woolitania Enquirer offers weekly cash prizes for 'most blasphemous song, story, or cartoon'. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Woolitania's national animal is the woolpertinger, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Cult of the Three Winds.

Woolitania is ranked 176^th in the world and 3^rd in Forest for Least Corrupt Governments, with 98.9 Percentage Of Bribes Refused.