The Glorious Empire of Woolitania is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by WooShell with an even hand, and remarkable for its ubiquitous missile silos, free-roaming dinosaurs, and anti-smoking policies. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 32.287 billion Woolitanians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The tiny, socially-minded government prioritizes Education, with Administration, Industry, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while Spirituality and Defense are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Woolitania City. The average income tax rate is 1.6%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Woolitanian economy, worth an astonishing 10,133 trillion woolians a year, is highly specialized and led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology and Tourism. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 313,860 woolians, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Teenagers are told they're not thinking about sex enough, the government is lending a hand to private industry, aging citizens are celebrating the end of the 'Early Bird War', and airplanes have giant grilles on their noses to knock drones out of their path. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Woolitania's national animal is the woolpertinger, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Cult of the Three Winds.

Woolitania is ranked 120^th in the world and 2^nd in Forest for Largest Information Technology Sector, scoring 120,147.17 on the Fann-Boi Productivity Index.