by Max Barry

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The Academic Dominion of Woollevia

“Non Torsii Subligarium”

Category: Iron Fist Consumerists
Civil Rights:
Unheard Of
Economy:
Frightening
Political Freedoms:
Outlawed

Regional Influence: Apprentice

Location: North Pacific

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Woollevia

Population23.852 billion

CapitalWoolham
LeaderHis Royal Swellness
FaithOur Lady of the Red Ball

Currencylugnut
Animalkraken

The Academic Dominion of Woollevia is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by His Royal Swellness with an iron fist, and remarkable for its closed borders, smutty television, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 23.852 billion Woollevians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Industry also on the agenda, while Social Policy and Environment aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Woolham. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 72.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Woollevian economy, worth an astonishing 14,837 trillion lugnuts a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Soda Sales. Average income is a breathtaking 622,075 lugnuts, with the richest citizens earning 7.1 times as much as the poorest.

The government has forked out millions on an unmade bed that is apparently East Lebatuckese "art", it is said that a Woollevian woman's work is never done, government-run brothels can be found on every street corner, and global anti-terrorist organisations strongly suspect Woollevia of supplying extremist groups. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Woollevia's national animal is the kraken, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Our Lady of the Red Ball.

Woollevia is ranked 65,425th in the world and 10th in North Pacific for Largest Publishing Industry, scoring 3,014.15 on the Bella Potter Productivity e-Index.

Top
1%
Largest Black Market: 22ndLargest Manufacturing Sector: 48thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 55thLargest Mining Sector: 56thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 58thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 60thLargest Insurance Industry: 98thHighest Average Incomes: 103rdLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 111thMost Corrupt Governments: 115thHighest Economic Output: 126thMost Avoided: 224thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 247thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 251stMost Advanced Defense Forces: 257thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 325thMost Subsidized Industry: 375thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 521stLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 525thMost Efficient Economies: 540thFattest Citizens: 619thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 664thLargest Gambling Industry: 823rdLargest Governments: 891stHighest Poor Incomes: 907thMost Primitive: 1,024thMost Armed: 1,294thMost Ignorant Citizens: 1,447thTop
5%
Largest Agricultural Sector: 2,273rdHighest Disposable Incomes: 2,318thMost Advanced Public Transport: 3,350thNudest: 3,369thLargest Populations: 3,538thRudest Citizens: 4,726thLargest Retail Industry: 4,980thLowest Crime Rates: 5,305thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 5,761stMost Conservative: 8,024thTop
10%
Most World Assembly Endorsements: 15,608th
Top
5%
Most Extensive Public Healthcare: 1st in the regionMost Primitive: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 1st in the regionLargest Governments: 1st in the regionLargest Black Market: 1st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 1st in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 1st in the regionFattest Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 1st in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 1st in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 1st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1st in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 1st in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 1st in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 1st in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 1st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1st in the regionNudest: 1st in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1st in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 1st in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 1st in the regionMost Avoided: 1st in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1st in the regionTop
10%
Largest Retail Industry: 2nd in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 2nd in the regionMost Armed: 2nd in the regionRudest Citizens: 2nd in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Woollevia, global anti-terrorist organisations strongly suspect Woollevia of supplying extremist groups.
  • : Following new legislation in Woollevia, government-run brothels can be found on every street corner.
  • : Following new legislation in Woollevia, it is said that a Woollevian woman's work is never done.
  • : Following new legislation in Woollevia, the government has forked out millions on an unmade bed that is apparently East Lebatuckese "art".
  • : Following new legislation in Woollevia, urban graffiti is hand-calligraphed in perfectly kerned elegant fonts.
  • : Following new legislation in Woollevia, there's a mortuary next to every Woollevian restaurant.
  • : Following new legislation in Woollevia, record sales of 'child-whacking sticks' have been reported.
  • : Following new legislation in Woollevia, flatulent people are left to die of cancer at the end of hospital waiting lists.
  • : Following new legislation in Woollevia, 'To Regulate And Beyond' is the unofficial motto of the Woollevian Space Agency.
  • : Woollevia's influence in North Pacific rose from "Squire" to "Apprentice".

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