by Max Barry

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The Hurt Feelings of Wussy States

“I'm Offended!” Anarchius

Category: Psychotic Dictatorship
Civil Rights:
Rare
Economy:
Good
Political Freedoms:
Rare

Regional Influence: Dealmaker

Location: The Fist of God

OverviewPoliciesPeopleGovernmentEconomyRankTrendCards

Wussy States

Population9.572 billion

CapitalFreeloadia
LeaderAnarchius

CurrencyTears
AnimalJackalope

The Hurt Feelings of Wussy States is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Anarchius with an iron fist, and renowned for its feral children, national health service, and irreverence towards religion. The compassionate, cynical, humorless population of 9.572 billion Wussies are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

It is difficult to tell where the omnipresent, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government stops and the rest of society begins, but it juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Industry, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Freeloadia. The average income tax rate is 77.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The Wussy Statesian economy, worth 278 trillion Tears a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, extremely specialized black market in Furniture Restoration. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 29,047 Tears, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

Excited shovel-bearing geeks wander the countryside, there's nothing more gay than bleeding for your nation, citizens no longer take selfies with their dead relatives at funerals, and graverobbers claim they're acting within the interest of 'scientific preservation'. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, probably because of the absence of a police force. Wussy States's national animal is the Jackalope, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Wussy States is ranked 63,080th in the world and 3rd in The Fist of God for Largest Welfare Programs, scoring 1,354.2 on the Safety Net Mesh Density Rating.

Top
1%
Highest Crime Rates: 753rdBest Weather: 1,039thMost Rebellious Youth: 1,499thTop
5%
Most Compassionate Citizens: 1,569thMost Primitive: 1,601stMost Beautiful Environments: 1,736thMost Pacifist: 1,857thNudest: 2,174thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 2,182ndLargest Black Market: 2,437thHealthiest Citizens: 3,112thNicest Citizens: 3,252ndMost Corrupt Governments: 4,009thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 4,362ndMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 6,802ndMost Authoritarian: 7,641stHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 7,734thMost Secular: 7,795thTop
10%
Most Inclusive: 11,443rdMost Cultured: 11,943rdMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 12,289thMost Subsidized Industry: 13,931stHighest Average Tax Rates: 14,952nd

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Wussy States was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Compassionate Citizens.
  • : Wussy States's influence in The Fist of God rose from "Instigator" to "Dealmaker".
  • : Wussy States was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Secular and the Top 10% for Highest Average Tax Rates.
  • : Following new legislation in Wussy States, graverobbers claim they're acting within the interest of 'scientific preservation'.
  • : Following new legislation in Wussy States, citizens no longer take selfies with their dead relatives at funerals.
  • : Following new legislation in Wussy States, there's nothing more gay than bleeding for your nation.
  • : Following new legislation in Wussy States, excited shovel-bearing geeks wander the countryside.
  • : Following new legislation in Wussy States, prisoners have been known to host cooking and home décor television shows.
  • : Wussy States was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Authoritarian.
  • : Following new legislation in Wussy States, they say insanity is torturing the same citizens over and over again and expecting a different result.

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