The Princess of Valentines of Xoriet is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by Kath Zandion Beralis with an even hand, and notable for its otherworldly petting zoo, national health service, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The compassionate, cheerful, devout population of 18.441 billion Xoriens are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, corrupt government prioritizes Education, although Industry, Healthcare, and Welfare are also considered important, while Defense and Spirituality receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Androssi. The average income tax rate is 99.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Xorien economy, worth a remarkable 5,334 trillion Saruns a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Information Technology, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 289,292 Saruns, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The acceptance of acupuncture and other alternative therapies has needled the scientific community, the installation of street lights across remote goat tracks has left citizens bemused, judicial robes are the country's hottest fashion trend, and the hardest thing for a mining operation to dig through is government red tape. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Xoriet's national animal is the Golden Ocelot, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Fate's Mandate.

Xoriet is ranked 117,654^th in the world and 966^th in the Pacific for Largest Black Market, with 313 billion Standard Monetary Units.