by Max Barry

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Spotlight on:

National Flag

The Resurrection of Yugobatania

“Mors Tua, Vita Mea”

Category: Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
Civil Rights:
Very Good
Political Freedoms:

Regional Influence: Sprat

Location: The North Pacific



NP RMB: After Hours: Episode Two: Crushes, or ďBaby don't hurt me, donít hurt me, no moreÖĒ

Good evening - or morning or afternoon, folks to another addition of NP RMB: After Hours, the only RMB talk show late at night - with your host, me, the Supreme President of Yugobatania.

Todayís topic: crushes. We all had one. Either it was that one girl or guy in your class, your teacher, your co-worker, even your local priest or priestess, crushes have been a part of human history since we discovered what the hell condoms were.

*Sips coffee*

Of course, there are the crushes in which they know about it too. Your person of interest might notice you staring - and might walk on over, and your wildest dreams come true.

Or they might come on over and slap you in the face. You donít know how many times this has happened to me in the past. Trust me.

*Sips coffee*

You know whatís even worse? Unrequited love. Hits you hard in the nutsack - or ovaries for you female listeners.

Especially in high school, when the fresh mind of a teenager has just discovered what the freedoms and horrors of puberty bring.

A teens mind is more prone to being heartbroken, and if they are, it stays with them for a long arse time. A very long arse time.

*Sips coffee*

I hope you enjoyed this episode of NP RMB: After Hours. Hopefully you find your special someone out there. I know I havenít. One day...

Iím the Supreme President of Yugobatania. Good night. Or morning. Or afternoon. Or - ah, forget about it already!