The Mazdayasna Commonwealth of Zebastani is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by PM Joseph Hadmirak with an iron fist, and remarkable for its enslaved workforce, otherworldly petting zoo, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 4.671 billion Zebastanians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The relatively small, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Defense, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Pyro. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 35.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Zebastanian economy, worth 903 trillion Zelts a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Retail, and Arms Manufacturing. Black market activity is extensive. Average income is an impressive 193,491 Zelts, with the richest citizens earning 5.8 times as much as the poorest.

Doctors accused of having no heart reply that cardiology isn't their speciality, jury selection begins with explaining what a jury is, prisoners can't do number twos without their "toilet buddy" present, and citizens applying for their first jobs face fierce competition from the homeless. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Zebastani's national animal is the giraffe, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Zoroastrianism.

Zebastani is ranked 12,346^th in the world and 108^th in 10000 Islands for Highest Average Incomes, with 193,491.74 Standard Monetary Units.