by Max Barry

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by The Unified Electorates of Ainslie. . 92 reads.

Past Two Weeks - 28/1 - 12/2

What should I be putting here
28 January-12 February Edition

Gday Islanders! Look who’s back…. Back again… Aussie’s back… back again. Most of you know the deal around this but for those who don’t I summarise the TWItter thread, the League thread and the news thread with a pinch of salt and opportunistic memes. I’d like to extend a somewhat warm, although empathetic, welcome to the nations who have made their way into Past Two Weeks for the first time: The gaya, Malagwi . So here’s this fortnight’s classifieds brought to you by Enchantan diplomatic maneuvers.

  • Want an extremely dangerous spider native to your nation (And a free factbook too?) Contact Osteran today!

  • Feel like getting some tea, a good arm chair and reading a short story about the descent of a terrorist involved in one of the biggest attacks in Suvurnian history from loyal citizen to communist zealot? Read Suvurnia’s citizen’s post today!

In the News

Legislature attempts blame shifting in bureaucratic Almorea, Rebels attack somewhere in a nation with a flag that’d get you a visit from the CIA and/or NSA. The Athara Magaratis attempt to fool us into thinking they have a democracy as individuals can now vote for the heads of their subdivisions whom will rotate holding the top job in the nation whilst the Totzkan Government starts up a new friendship group with Dragao Do Mar and Almorea featuring a “classic turbulent world, this alliance will give us strength to face challenges” speech. Almorean President mocked by heckler who is probably laughing at this alliance whilst looking at MSTO.

Thank you Almorea, Dragao do Mar and New Totzka.... You have no idea how long it’s taken me to get a way to incorporate this meme into Past Two Weeks.

Cosian Government brings in a new flag designed by some hip, trendy, [i]off dah streetz artist. Hillbillies vote in Ainslie and kick up a mini political storm whilst cricket teams in the nation get ready to face off in a 2 month long domestic Twenty/20 competition. The Dormill-Stiuraian and Noronnicans finally agree about something in Arvan and decide to split up the territory Korea style whilst the Chancellor of Malagwi decides a budget increase in healthcare isn’t such a bad thing.

Might need to convince his people (who nominally earn $15,000 a year) though.

Leader of Menna Shuli apparently has made a recovery and will appear in public soon whilst the Noronnican civil war they’re not calling a civil war continues. Scientists and Politicians in The Gaya claim an island in the name of Gaya science whilst the head of Menna Shuli gives us a statement on their health. Roendavarian Government trolls their neighbours, stating that Sawneeak is claimed by the nation as a “claimless national park”, “standing with nature”. People on Dulung, a kind of Suvurnian island get super angry with Roendavar. The nation of Belle Ilse en Terre opens a new airport and a new island. Leader of Enchanta is preganant whilst a religious school isn’t following the curriculum. The Mennan government increases trade regulations and checks for goods from San Javier. Martial law declared in Noronica courtesy of an ominous speech from the totally not foreshadowy overlord of Noronica.

And in the League

Miklanian delegate shows concerning concern about a nation halfway across the map whilst the Athara Magarati jumps unsurprisingly to conclusions. Ahnslen delegate ponders a passive aggressive response. Suvurnian delegate questions motives of Miklania and the League whilst the Miklanian delegate is put a bit off guard by little diplomatic fire brewing. Noronnican delegate hardly eases people’s minds about Arvan. Athara Magarati delegate backs down whilst the Corindian reminds us we shouldn’t count the militant, destabilising chickens before they hatch.

Athara Magarati government attempts to quietly kick up that whole canal thing again as a threat whilst the Corindian shuts her down. Dormill and Stiura plays the “we’re the defenders” role, leaving the Miklanian delegate continues to shut down the Athara Magarati. Wellsian delegate controversially sides with the people that haven’t been democratically elected whilst the Dormill-Stiuraian and Wellsian delegates get into a legal argument over a third party’s constitution. Athara Magarati delegates hopes that there’s a mobile-friendly version of the Noronnican constitution and then the Ahnslen delegate suggests that perhaps experts in the law should be interpreting the law.

And on that note…

The Athara Magarat circus continues as the nation apparently gets more democratic and their who knows how manyst diplomat makes a hasty exit to run in the national elections. Ahnslen delegate is confused whilst the Svalbardian delegate continues being aggressive and annoying. We get an introduction from the new Athara Magarati delegate whilst the Almorean delegate has IW Flashbacks. Athara Magarati delegate attempts to twist the already-manipulated perceptions of Athara Magarati collectivism into an argument of democracy as the Enchantan delegate re-enters the League chamber. Vancouvian delegate acts like an angry middle school teacher whilst the Enchantan delegate replies with a sassy none of your business style comment. Suvurnian delegate criticises the Vancouvian delegate and then the Mennan delegate introduces a bill to get Keverai observer status in the League (as a result of a back room deal in which they get surplus power and short term temporary skilled labour). The Wellsian delegate gives out an ultimatum to Dormill and Stiura whilst the Balniki delegate attempts to make Dormill and Stiura seem like the aggressive belligerent. The Athara Magarati supports Keveraite’s ascendance whilst pondering a contested territory’s entrance into the League. Ahnslen delegate links fufilling Keverai’s wants with ensuring its still a democracy whilst getting angry over the suggestion Kachee could join the League. Athara Magarati backtracks. Dormill-Stiuraian delegate keeps nice and quiet as the Wellsian delegate hastely leaves. Mennan delegate has an unsatisfying encounter with the Enchantan delegate outside of the chamber with its origins being this:

In my imagination, at least.

Mennan delegate then gets a summary from the Athara Magarati delegate on the chances of Keveraite membership. Wellsian somehow becomes their nation’s spokesperson to the league despite hating public speaking whilst Miklania, Polar Svalbard and Noronica second the Mennan’s motion. Twelve nations vote in support for Keverai membership (although the Roendavarian does reluctantly), Vancouvia abstains

Activate truthaboutkeverai.exe

And in the Tweetesphere

Totzkan Bureau of Foreign Affairs gives us ambiguous mini-trailer for a summit between three North Mesder nations whilst @RealPresident40 from Almorea also does so. Alteran Air Defence are wanting some new flying toys whilst that Suvurnian meme account continues. Malagwi Government continues the process to execute a person who merdered four school children.

I hope that’s enough memes for you to get through another fortnight. I’ll see you next time.

Tagging Vancouvia since he seems to like these