by Max Barry

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DispatchAccountDiplomacy

by The All Time Favourite Republic of Indusse. . 6 reads.

BADGES FOR TRAC

[Issue] Pointing the Goldfinger
[Validity] No autarky, co-authored by Electrum

[Description] A Bigtopian diplomatic bag was accidentally searched by Customs at @@CAPITAL@@ Airport, contrary to diplomatic conventions. Before the search was stopped, the bag was found to contain cocaine brownies, snortable marijuana, gold leaf toilet paper rolls, and jars of whale oil. Even though the bags were promptly handed over to the Bigtopian embassy, questions have been raised about this discovery.

[Option] "This is the most obvious case of smuggling Iíve ever seen!" says customs officer @@RANDOMNAME@@, who claims to be a smuggling expert after arresting a man wearing a trenchcoat full of fake watches last week. "Those Bigtopians are abusing our trust by bringing in all manner of things without paying the import duties. You need to punish the Bigtopians by expelling them immediately, even if it exposes us as breaking diplomatic conventions."
[Validity] drugs legalised
[Effect] no one gossips with @@LEADER@@ during diplomatic summits

[Option] "This is the most obvious case of smuggling Iíve ever seen!" says customs officer @@RANDOMNAME@@, who claims to be a smuggling expert after arresting a man wearing a trenchcoat full of fake watches last week. "Those Bigtopians are abusing our trust by bringing in all manner of illegal items, and not paying duties on the legal ones. You need to punish the Bigtopians by expelling them immediately, even if it exposes us as breaking diplomatic conventions."
[Validity] drugs illegal
[Effect] no one gossips with @@LEADER@@ during diplomatic summits

[Option] "These illegal products are just the tip of the iceberg," states spy-master N, who issued James Bont both his license to kill and his exploding pen license. "Imagine the valuable intelligence we could find by opening every countryís diplomatic bags. We could learn military secrets, the names of foreign spies within our country and replicate their passports for espionage. Itís the right thing to do for our glorious @@TYPE@@."
[Effect] diplomatic cables about @@LEADER@@ have suddenly been very flattering

[Option] After a long dayís hard work, you receive a call from the Bigtopian ambassador. "We know you opened our diplomatic bags. Please, spare us the embarrassment and donít inform our authorities about what youíve found. In return for your discretion, we would be willing to offer a generous donation to your treasury."
[Effect] sperm oil get smuggled through the back door

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