by Max Barry

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DispatchAccountDrama

by The Holy Authority of Drenth Islands. . 15 reads.

Acknowledging the events of Zidday.

In yesterday’s tragic zombie outbreak, there was more than just flesh that was rotten. Our attitudes and morality were spoiled along with the corpses of our fallen. As a possible cause of the catastrophic events, Drenth Islands would like to apologise for the many, many deaths our careless actions created. As Aviary and us tried our best to utilise these zombies, it seems we got slightly carried away and accidentally shot some straight into Weaven, who was working on a cure. We also promised to clear out the zombies, but forgot to do so.

Top Drenth scientists have found that there seems to be a mental effect of the infection, even on the uninfected. We can only assume this is what caused such crass decisions as last night’s.

In retrospect however, it is obvious that the thing that was missing from this disaster was diplomacy. If the members of the DAWS Pact had all held each other accountable to the agreement, then this would never have escalated so drastically. Thus making it clear that the DAWS Pact is a necessity for the continued survival of our world peace dream.

We would also like to point out that ANUS did nothing to help in this catastrophe. Thus making it clear that ANUS is useless, as the involved nations simply don’t have the influence or firepower necessary to enforce anything.

Sincerely sorry, Drenth Islands

COO of the Trout Essembly

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