by Max Barry

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«12. . .1,2471,2481,2491,2501,2511,2521,253. . .2,7682,769»

The neo-Enclave wrote:It's not a city

It's an archeological sight

Neo Vikings of Easthumbria wrote:Then me guess I have ta make an example.

Hmm, El Dorado be tha most northern city. Launchin' 500 scramjet fighters ta keep yer planes away.
An' then me starts by kindly sendin' in 5 cruise missiles that be launched from cruise missile submarines, each landin' in a pentagram around tha city but jus' missin' as warnin shot.

Then I send tha message on tha public radio an' TV channels "Surrender yer valuables or be incinerated". No one needs ta get hurt, but if we let yea refuse an' just go our ways we be settin' a bad example.

We do 'ave ballistic missiles submarines too.

Neo Vikings of Easthumbria wrote:Hey, it be soundin' rich an' donna tell me yea don't 'ave riches at a place like El Dorado.

Give me yer loot.

Its booby trapped so good luck getting further then us...and it's in the middle of thick jungle with heavy aa protection

The neo-Enclave wrote:AMD we have nuclear shelters across the countries...thanks vault tec

I dunno use nukes. Tha Guv'nor get mad at me then. But I can still sail aroun' and blow yer crap up so it will be cheaper jus' givin' me tha loot then ta rebuild it.

An me got me reputation ta think off. I can be bought off at Danegeld but if I don't get that I will blow anythin worthwhile at yer coast ta smithereens.

Neo Vikings of Easthumbria wrote:I dunno use nukes. Tha Guv'nor get mad at me then. But I can still sail aroun' and blow yer crap up so it will be cheaper jus' givin' me tha loot then ta rebuild it.

An me got me reputation ta think off. I can be bought off at Danegeld but if I don't get that I will blow anythin worthwhile at yer coast ta smithereens.

If you blow the greatest archeological site to smithereens we crash planes in to your ships (not suicide attack because we eject)

Neo Vikings of Easthumbria wrote:I dunno use nukes. Tha Guv'nor get mad at me then. But I can still sail aroun' and blow yer crap up so it will be cheaper jus' givin' me tha loot then ta rebuild it.

An me got me reputation ta think off. I can be bought off at Danegeld but if I don't get that I will blow anythin worthwhile at yer coast ta smithereens.

But we can pay you off...what's your price

The neo-Enclave wrote:Its booby trapped so good luck getting further then us...and it's in the middle of thick jungle with heavy aa protection

It looks ta be at tha coast on tha map. an' sume ballistic missiles be takin care o' tha AAs and booby traps.

Heck, I could send me ballistic missiles ta yea from anywhere in tha world, I got ICBMs even if I just use conventional warheads on them. Yea on tha other hand have Scuds and me antimissiles can take those out while yers 'ave 5% to hit one o' mine.

The neo-Enclave wrote:But we can pay you off...what's your price

A third o' tha valuables in each coastal city, then I'll be off by me merry way an' guaranteed ta not come back fer more in at least 12 months. An' donna try ta cheat me.

Neo Vikings of Easthumbria wrote:It looks ta be at tha coast on tha map. an' sume ballistic missiles be takin care o' tha AAs and booby traps.

Heck, I could send me ballistic missiles ta yea from anywhere in tha world, I got ICBMs even if I just use conventional warheads on them. Yea on tha other hand have Scuds and me antimissiles can take those out while yers 'ave 5% to hit one o' mine.

Still going to have my vaults...now I'm going to ask again what'd be yer pricel

Neo Vikings of Easthumbria wrote:A third o' tha valuables in each coastal city, then I'll be off by me merry way an' guaranteed ta not come back fer more in at least 12 months. An' donna try ta cheat me.

Again I can either give you a 100k copies of donalia's autobiography or 500 platypus medium tanks

The neo-Enclave wrote:Again I can either give you a 100k copies of donalia's autobiography or 500 platypus medium tanks

That be soundin' like terrible loot. What would I need tanks fer?

If yea aren't interested me thinks I might be forced ta do a demonstration. I rather not, wastin' cities cut into me profits.

Neo Vikings of Easthumbria wrote:That be soundin' like terrible loot. What would I need tanks fer?

If yea aren't interested me thinks I might be forced ta do a demonstration. I rather not, wastin' cities cut into me profits.

Then wtf are you raiding...that's what you'd find in your raids

Neo Vikings of Easthumbria wrote:That be soundin' like terrible loot. What would I need tanks fer?

If yea aren't interested me thinks I might be forced ta do a demonstration. I rather not, wastin' cities cut into me profits.

I'm not intimdAted I can knock them out of the sky

The neo-Enclave wrote:Then wtf are you raiding...that's what you'd find in your raids

The frighteningly efficient neo-Enclavean economy, worth 405 trillion Bottlecap Marks a year... Don't give me crap, while yea aren't as rich as Anacodia Odinburgh or IDM yer people 'ave money an' valuables.

I jus' want a third o what people in coastal cities 'ave. That be standard vikin' fees since tha old days.

Neo Vikings of Easthumbria wrote:The frighteningly efficient neo-Enclavean economy, worth 405 trillion Bottlecap Marks a year... Don't give me crap, while yea aren't as rich as Anacodia Odinburgh or IDM yer people 'ave money an' valuables.

I jus' want a third o what people in coastal cities 'ave. That be standard vikin' fees since tha old days.

Yeah that's the thing...I keep telling you I dont keep me valuables on the coast

The neo-Enclave wrote:I'm not intimdAted I can knock them out of the sky

How? Me thinks yea missed tha anti missile rules. I'll be havin' 5 times yer arms manufacturing score.

Neo Vikings of Easthumbria wrote:The frighteningly efficient neo-Enclavean economy, worth 405 trillion Bottlecap Marks a year... Don't give me crap, while yea aren't as rich as Anacodia Odinburgh or IDM yer people 'ave money an' valuables.

I jus' want a third o what people in coastal cities 'ave. That be standard vikin' fees since tha old days.

I can send you 500 million bottlecaps

The neo-Enclave wrote:Yeah that's the thing...I keep telling you I dont keep me valuables on the coast

So people in yer large amount o' coastal cities don't get paid, yea 'ave no banks or no nuthin there?

Yea, right. Yea think that jus' because we be vikings we be stupid?

Neo Vikings of Easthumbria wrote:How? Me thinks yea missed tha anti missile rules. I'll be havin' 5 times yer arms manufacturing score.

I dont think you get what I mean by that...I'm saying I can knock them out not through anti missile measures but through these negotiations

The neo-Enclave wrote:I can send you 500 million bottlecaps

1 trillion. An' yea can collect it frem private citiezens, companies or tha governemnt, I dunno care.

Neo Vikings of Easthumbria wrote:So people in yer large amount o' coastal cities don't get paid, yea 'ave no banks or no nuthin there?

Yea, right. Yea think that jus' because we be vikings we be stupid?

The neo-Enclave wrote:I can send you 500 million bottlecaps

Neo Vikings of Easthumbria wrote:1 trillion. An' yea can collect it frem private citiezens, companies or tha governemnt, I dunno care.

Sure (I got a plan)

The neo-Enclave wrote:

I'm not giving you it in the money itself but the equivalent in gold

The neo-Enclave wrote:Sure (I got a plan)

Tha fleet goes out ta international waters, splittin' up in 4 lesser units (maybe tha subs too, yea donna 'ave the detection ta see that).

Yea 'ave 24 hours, then we be sending in a cargo ship ta pick up tha Danegeld. We will also mail yea a contract, stating that if yea pay up (in yer official currency) we will stay off frem plundering anything on land or islands an' just the usual quota o' merchant ships and yachts we plunder frem all nations besides Krimera, GV an' NNE.

We donna want ta overfish so our pirates get quotas unless sumeone invites us like here. Or annoys us.

There be also a clause saying if yea screw us over we be blockading yea frem sea. We du not like being screwed.

The neo-Enclave wrote:I'm not giving you it in the money itself but the equivalent in gold

And how much gold would that be?

Neo Vikings of Easthumbria wrote:Tha fleet goes out ta international waters, splittin' up in 4 lesser units (maybe tha subs too, yea donna 'ave the detection ta see that).

Yea 'ave 24 hours, then we be sending in a cargo ship ta pick up tha Danegeld. We will also mail yea a contract, stating that if yea pay up (in yer official currency) we will stay off frem plundering anything on land or islands an' just the usual quota o' merchant ships and yachts we plunder frem all nations besides Krimera, GV an' NNE.

We donna want ta overfish so our pirates get quotas unless sumeone invites us like here. Or annoys us.

There be also a clause saying if yea screw us over we be blockading yea frem sea. We du not like being screwed.

Yeah you blocke us...we go other way around over your Confederate ally's land

«12. . .1,2471,2481,2491,2501,2511,2521,253. . .2,7682,769»

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