by Max Barry

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«12. . .4,0324,0334,0344,0354,0364,0374,038. . .5,0515,052»

can i have a candy crush soda PLZ

Anacin

Could I have an Moscow Mule?

Anacin

New Poll!!
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Elite leomonade wrote:Could I have an Moscow Mule?

Now that sounds good. Make that two!

Anacin and Elite leomonade

Elite leomonade wrote:Could I have an Moscow Mule?

The newsstand wrote:Now that sounds good. Make that two!

Serves Two Moscow Mules

Zombie Penguins, The newsstand, and Elite leomonade

Mindon wrote:Hey Brocklandia, I’m going back to the facility. What do I owe you?

Your life and payment for this rather lengthy bar tab, which stretches some 72 meters last time I checked. Pay the cashier on your way out.

Local now news wrote:can i have a candy crush soda PLZ

Sure!

*leads out a mule hauling a cart loaded with a fifty-gallon drum of candy crush soda*

Elite leomonade wrote:Could I have an Moscow Mule?

And for you ...

*leads the mule over after unloading the cart*

One mule from Moscow, as requested. Her name is Ivanka.

Elite leomonade and Local now news

Brocklandia wrote:Your life and payment for this rather lengthy bar tab, which stretches some 72 meters last time I checked. Pay the cashier on your way out.

Oh. Well, I’ll have to acquire some funds very quickly to pay that off. Give me a moment.

669-333: What’s today’s password?
Mindon: 22 Dead Men in a box.
669-333: What do you need boss?
Mindon: Send a team to covertly hijack a shipment of gold, then sell it on the black market. Send the profits to the The Bar on the corner of every region
669-333: Paying up your bar tab again?
Mindon: Never mind how much of a bar tab I may or may not have racked up, just do it.
669-333: Alright boss, I’ll call you when it’s done.

Is it okay if I arrange payment to be delivered in the next five or so days?

Howard beale

Anacin wrote:Serves Two Moscow Mules

*Takes the slice of lime and runs it around the rim, before squeezing the remaining juice into the ginger flavoured concoction. He takes a sip, then makes a face.*
That ginger isn't up to much.

Anacin and Howard beale

Watches through a window.

Anacin and Howard beale

Samuel pepys wrote:Watches through a window.

Sir, if your going to stare, go to the peep show next door.

Howard beale and Samuel pepys

The weekend poetry contest has begun! All freeform poems will be judged by PR Megaforce.

Drunkndisorderly, PR Megaforce, and Howard beale

*A zombie throws the Crustacean cashier into the kitchen for cheffy to prepare*

Drunkndisorderly and Howard beale

Anacin wrote:Sir, if your going to stare, go to the peep show next door.

Looks around at the strange environs one has found themselves in

Pray tell is this Heaven? I suppose a tavern outside the realities of a plague ridden olde London town are fine compared to one inside such a reality...

Steps inside

Mindon wrote:Is it okay if I arrange payment to be delivered in the next five or so days?

Sure. Time is at best an illusion, and at worst a hairy, drooling monster intent on crushing the life out of each and every one of us ... or am I thinking of TheOrc?

Samuel pepys wrote:Pray tell is this Heaven? I suppose a tavern outside the realities of a plague ridden olde London town are fine compared to one inside such a reality...

Why, surely, good sirrah, this is that very Heaven of which you speak, so long as this Heaven of yours includes copious amounts of spirits, a chef who may or may not be intent on using dead patrons as an ingredient in every dish, and an array of quasi-mythical deities and monsters wandering the premises. If you stop by the restrooms, remember to say hello to Cthulhu, who lives in there.

Samuel pepys

Zombie Penguins wrote:*A zombie throws the Crustacean cashier into the kitchen for cheffy to prepare*

Well, dang it. We lose more cashiers that way.

Zombie Penguins and Anacin

Brocklandia wrote:Well, dang it. We lose more cashiers that way.

I call dibs on the crab legs.

Brocklandia wrote:Sure. Time is at best an illusion, and at worst a hairy, drooling monster intent on crushing the life out of each and every one of us ... or am I thinking of TheOrc?

Alright, I'll come back when the money comes through. *exits the bar*

Mindon wrote:Alright, I'll come back when the money comes through. *exits the bar*

Heh. Little does that guy know we drained hir bank account less than an hour ago. Hey, TheOrc has been busy in the back room.

Names are too hard

I would like to order a money-Rita. It’s a specialty cocktail made with 3 hundred dollar bills in a champagne flute.

Brocklandia wrote:Heh. Little does that guy know we drained hir bank account less than an hour ago. Hey, TheOrc has been busy in the back room.

You know I can hear you right? The window still hasn't been repaired from when Howard beale shot a rocket through it in order to blow up what he thought was my car.

Howard beale

Brocklandia wrote:Why, surely, good sirrah, this is that very Heaven of which you speak, so long as this Heaven of yours includes copious amounts of spirits, a chef who may or may not be intent on using dead patrons as an ingredient in every dish, and an array of quasi-mythical deities and monsters wandering the premises. If you stop by the restrooms, remember to say hello to Cthulhu, who lives in there.

Shrugs shoulders

Not much difference from olde London town then!

Samuel pepys wrote:Not much difference from olde London town then!

Sure there is. Our Cthulhu is bigger ... and meaner ... And we have a Spaghetti Monster in the basement. And we serve drinks. The fare here may kill you, but isn't the element of danger half the fun?

Drunkndisorderly and Samuel pepys

Mindon wrote:You know I can hear you right? The window still hasn't been repaired from when Howard beale shot a rocket through it in order to blow up what he thought was my car.

You know we don't care whether you hear or not, right? We drained your account, so you can't afford a lawyer to sue us. Besides, TheOrc tends to eat everyone who tries to sue us ... which probably explains why TheOrc is so fat--er, I mean, well-fed.

Howard beale

Names are too hard wrote:I would like to order a money-Rita. It’s a specialty cocktail made with 3 hundred dollar bills in a champagne flute.

Here you go--the Bar's version, a Monopoly-money-rita. It's a specialty version made with pureed Monopoly money, since our cashiers both died recently, and no one else can get into the cash drawer.

«12. . .4,0324,0334,0344,0354,0364,0374,038. . .5,0515,052»

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