by Max Barry

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The South Pacific World Census

The Smartest Citizens in the South Pacific

The World Census eavesdropped on conversations in coffee shops, on campuses, and around cinemas in order to determine which nations have the most quick-witted, insightful, and knowledgeable citizens.

As a region, the South Pacific is ranked 8,100th in the world for Smartest Citizens.

NationWA CategoryMotto
1.The Armed Republic of Crazed monkiesDemocratic Socialists“Vote monkey, get monkey”
2.The Technocracy of The Clockwork RepublicLiberal Democratic Socialists“The Way Forward”
3.The PS2 Puppet of HeliosphereCorrupt Dictatorship“Stop reading my motto!”
4.The Dracocracy of TheorinDemocratic Socialists“We have no beginning. We have no end. We are infinite.”
5.The Kingdom of Outer Utonixick GollinicanDemocratic Socialists“Whatever, I do what I want”
6.The Northern Hinterland of TeaberryDemocratic Socialists“Pithy Latin phrase.”
7.The Federal Republic of West green IsraelLeft-wing Utopia“For greener future”
8.The Republic of Kiasu-ismLiberal Democratic Socialists“Kiasi, Kiabor, and most importantly... Kiasu!”
9.The Community of LaocracyDemocratic Socialists“Labor omnia vincit”
10.The United Socialist States of EmailistanScandinavian Liberal Paradise“Collectivization of Labour is Most Beneficial to All”
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