The West PacificBoard

#pundayMonday - well, not so much a pun more a long joke which I can remember being told (brilliantly) by The Big Yin, Billy Connolly.

Jimmy, a junior signalman for the local railway, has decided to apply for promotion to senior signalman, and has been told to meet the inspector at the signal box to take his exam.

The inspector decides to find out how Jimmy would react under pressure, so asks him, "What would you do if you realized that two trains were heading towards each other on the same track?" Immediately, Jimmy says, "I would switch one train onto the other track, thus averting a disaster."

"Good - but what if the lever broke?" asks the inspector. "Well, I'd run down to the tracks, activate the manual lever, thus averting a disaster" answers Jimmy.

"What if that had been struck by lightning?" challenges the inspector. "In that case," Jimmy continues, "I'd run back up here and use the phone to call the next signal box, thus averting a disaster."

"What if the phone was busy?" comes the next quickfire question. "Well," Jimmy argues, "I'd have to run to the street level and use the public phone near the station, thus averting a disaster".

"What if the public phone was on fire?" "Oh, well," says Jimmy, "in that case I'd run into town and get my Uncle Alistair."

Puzzled, the inspector asks, "Why would you do that?"

Jimmy replies "Because he's never seen a train crash..."

#pundaymonday - not so much a pun but comedic word play at its finest:
https://youtu.be/jgYbogp1Ha0?si=QWjiOxmcsJMPx7SJ

Fujai wrote:

The universe smiles upon me today.

I started cutting a bunch of summer sausage slices for lunch, and without even intending to, cut the exact same number of cheese slices, and grabbed the exact same number of crackers, such that when I got to the end of them all I was left with exactly one of each.

Fun fact, that would have made me sad. I love a little piece of some odd one to remain at the end, for solo enjoying, sort of like a good bye present from the world.

Esller wrote:

Hello everybody. I'm new here.

Hi, welcome to the West Pacific. Please have a read of our New Player’s Guide - it will help you get started in the game.

Godsr wrote:

hi to everyone

Hello!

It's gloomy here too
Getting colder day by day
Winters icy hand

Bones and joints achy
Elderly go I into
Refrigerator

The last leaves let go
Scattered by the wind, they flee
Days turning darker

Ratelo wrote:

An American
Experiences
No cold weather in

New Cairo, Egypt
Cold weather is forbidden
I miss seeing snow

#haikusday

Same here in SC
Nothing here but sunny skies
And warm temps down south

I just want to feel
The cold on my skin, like a
Refrigerator

#haikusday

BrightonBurg wrote:

S'up all.

/Waves 👋

Bonjour!!