The Federal Republic of Crustoria is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, remarkable for its soft-spoken computers, enslaved workforce, and zero percent divorce rate. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 1.319 billion Crustorians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Law & Order. The average income tax rate is 75.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong Crustorian economy, worth 139 trillion Crusts a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an impressive 105,613 Crusts, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.1 times as much as the poorest.

Professionals are ready to retire by the time they receive permission to use their credentials, the government's economic policy can be summed up as "Abort, Retry, Fail?", authorities are looking for a stool pigeon to rat out who is stealing food from pigeon toilets, and goldfish bowls are three metres in diameter. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Crustoria's national animal is the Brotadler, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Crustoria is ranked 240,465^th in the world and 5,370^th in The North Pacific for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 47.09 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.