The Allied States of The Iron Lions is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Father Lionel Atrox with an even hand, and notable for its anti-smoking policies, compulsory military service, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, humorless population of 15.215 billion Iron Lions are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, corrupt, socially-minded morass — juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Father Lion's Hall. The average income tax rate is 98.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Iron Lionisian economy, worth a remarkable 2,385 trillion Lionisian Crowns a year, is highly specialized and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Information Technology, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 156,810 Lionisian Crowns, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The official Iron Lionisian Phrase Book weighs as much as a small child, shipping canals are a bit like unimaginative cheese shops -- filled with debris, the military has gone fission for more funding, and contemporary art museums showcase the latest in centuries-old art. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Iron Lions's national animal is the Lion, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Secularism.

The Iron Lions is ranked 253,901^st in the world and 5,619^th in The North Pacific for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 44.35 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.